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I've been a bridesmaid over 125 times. Here are the 5 things I made sure not to have at my own wedding.

Apr 5, 2022, 21:25 IST
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I had a small wedding with close family and friends.Susan Shek Photography
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I've been to hundreds of strangers' weddings as a hired bridesmaid.

After each one, I make note of a few things I adored and other things that bothered me. Once I got engaged, I used all of that research to help plan my own wedding.

Read on for the things I knew I didn't want at my wedding.

I didn't want to fill the venue with loud music no one could talk over

One of my biggest pet peeves at weddings is loud music that makes it hard to chat with the people around you.

I don't think a wedding should feel like a nightclub. They're social events, and endless noise can upset guests and persuade them to leave as early as possible.

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I decided to skip having a band or DJ and instead played music from a phone and speaker, so I had complete control over the sound levels.

I saved money by not buying tons of decor that no one would even notice

My bouquet served multiple purposes.Susan Shek Photography

A lot of couples spend a sizable amount of money on decorations they think they need. But most guests never even notice them.

I've seen beautiful centerpieces with sky-high flower arrangements practically get ignored, tables of party favors left untouched, and beautifully monogrammed napkins used to wipe cheese off guests' faces.

I decided to save a lot of money and limit my decor to a few things, namely flowers and candles.

We didn't need endless amounts of food

Food and drinks definitely matter at a wedding. But having endless options or a multiple-course meal usually leads to waste.

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In an effort to cut down on spending and make sure I didn't have piles of leftovers, I just asked my guest what they wanted beforehand.

It was a customized way to give everyone refreshments they'd be happy with.

No one likes a long-winded ceremony

I think 25 minutes is the ceremony sweet spot.Susan Shek Photography

I truly believe that one of the best parts of any wedding is the ceremony. But most guests are just praying it doesn't last too long.

In an effort to have a meaningful ceremony that wouldn't leave everyone tapping their toes and eyeing the refreshments, I decided to keep it to 25 minutes — any longer and people get antsy.

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My wedding day was mostly drama-free

One of the most common things I see at weddings is some level of drama, between family members, friends, or even the couple themselves.

Weddings make people emotional and stressed out. But I vowed from day one of planning that I wouldn't allow drama at my celebration.

I put my phone on silent in the morning so I wouldn't receive any stressful messages, and my partner and I agreed that if anything went wrong, we'd just let it go.

When I left my flowers at home and didn't have them for some of the photos, he calmly reminded me of that pact. And when family and friends expressed disappointment over some of our decisions, I put a swift end to the conversation.

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