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I was a teacher before having kids of my own. Here are 8 ways teaching prepared me for parenthood.

Jun 13, 2023, 00:24 IST
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The author.Courtesy of the author
  • Lesson planning and classroom management didn't really help when I had a newborn cluster feeding.
  • But the chaotic demands of being a teacher did set me up for success when it came to parenting.
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If you think spending eight hours a day teaching young people would make for a natural transition into parenthood, you're right. Kind of.

While lesson planning and classroom management did little to prepare me for newborn cluster feeding or toddler tantrums, my experience coping with the chaotic and sometimes overwhelming demands of teaching readied me for parenting in other unexpected ways.

Accepting I wasn't superhuman

Therapist, social worker, mandated reporter, confiscator of cell phones — these are just some of my classroom roles outside of delivering instruction that aligns with 48 different learning standards. The all-consuming nature of these demands is similar to that of intensive yet gentle parenting.

While society may expect teachers and moms to be superhuman, I am not. Through teaching, I learned to let go of perfectionism and set my own realistic expectations for myself.

It's so much harder than you think

Everyone warns you about your first year of teaching, but you truly don't know how hard it is until you're in it. The same is true for first-time (and second-time) parenting. Knowing that I could survive the classroom gave me a glimmer of hope that I'd make it through those early sleepless nights.

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Navigating a lack of structural support

It's no secret that the US underinvests in both education and families. Parents and teachers are left to fill in gaps, which only exacerbates inequalities. Keeping this bigger picture in mind has been central to how I navigate both–and keep from going blind with rage. While I'm still stuck spending my own money on school supplies and paying out-of-pocket for preschool, I make sure also to take actions aimed at changing these conditions, such as advocating for universal paid family leave and the restructuring of education funding.

Doing things, I swore I'd never do

I'll never forget the first time I put on a movie so I could catch up on grading. It was humbling to watch my noble ideals get trampled by the reality of limited planning time. But in teaching, as in parenting, there are times when survival is more important.

I've learned to distinguish between my no-never's and when-I-can's, and focus on long-term sustainability. So bring on the Cocomelon and Cheddar Bunnies.

Securing your own life mask

In teaching, you can kill yourself trying to do and be everything. If you're going to survive the high teacher burnout rates, you have to learn to disconnect, let some things go undone, and prioritize self-care. The same is true for parenting. When you ensure some alone time or — gasp — take your whole lunch break, everyone benefits.

Delaying your basic needs

Holding your pee for hours and shoving a protein bar in your mouth while making one-handed photocopies is actually decent training for having a baby, now that I think about it.

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Letting go of outside opinions

Disregarding the skill and intellectual rigor of the profession means that everyone thinks they know how teachers should do their jobs. And if you've ever posted about sleep or potty training on social media, you know the same goes for parenting.

In both, I've learned to listen to qualified experts, let go of the uninformed layman's opinion, and use the strategies that work best with the children in front of me.

Finding your own value

Society undervalues teachers and parents, especially mothers. So it's crucial to find your own sense of value and purpose in what you do. Which isn't too hard when you see a lightbulb going on in a student's eyes, or hear your child laughing uproariously at your Peppa Pig imitation. In those moments, you can let the haters be damned, and know that you don't just have the hardest job in the world–you also have the best.

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