I was a college academic advisor. I want to debunk the myth of the 'dream school' for students.

• I was a college academic advisor for six years.
• A good school for students is one that gives them opportunities — and all schools will do that.

Every year, I asked incoming freshmen why they chose our school. Many had dreamed of going there. And then there were others: "Well, it wasn't my first choice. But it's where I got financial aid, so here I am."

I heard variations on this every year, sometimes accompanied by a shamefaced shrug. We romanticize looking for a top-choice college that's "a good fit" or "the right place for you." Students who don't get into or can't afford their first-choice school worry about missing out.

Perhaps it comes from US News and World Report rankings —which some universities are now pushing back on —early-decision programs, or universities eager to recruit. Or maybe it comes from us parents worrying about our kids being left behind economically and seeking "good schools" to get ahead.

While there are certain things to evaluate — accreditation, graduation rates, campus safety — I won't talk with my kids about a "dream" school. After years of working in higher education, I want to teach them to make the most of wherever they attend. Other experts agree; getting into a top school isn't necessarily the best goal.

College is expensive, and debt should factor into decision-making

College comes with enormous costs for students and families. For my kids, a big deciding factor will be debt, and we'll be open to all postsecondary options.

I know firsthand how debt constrains postgraduation choices. From a combination of luck, privilege, and effort, I graduated from college debt-free. I was able to teach overseas, which paid little but was rich in experience. Later, my partner and I both attended graduate school. While we chose programs funded by teaching and research assistantships, we still amassed over $130,000 in debt between us. We both enjoy our jobs, but every choice since then — employers, family, homes, vacations — has been shaped by debt.

Not every school has deep pockets and wealthy alumni. But every institution — and I mean community colleges, state schools of all sizes, trade schools, private schools, and online degree programs — has talented, dedicated professionals and professors connected to others in their field. Every institution has job boards, career counselors, internships, and community connections.

Every school has opportunities

In my opinion, a school that connects you to opportunities is a good school. And all schools can do that if you're someone who welcomes opportunity, works hard, asks questions, talks with professors, visits the career center, and tries out student organizations and internships.

This is what I'll tell my children. And then I'll share this story: My partner works with an intern who attended our small community college. She worked hard in engineering classes and was encouraged by professors to apply for the internship. While interning, she was responsible and dedicated. Now the company is helping her finish her bachelor's with a scholarship to cover expenses at our state school. She has many connections and career prospects after graduation. This is not a student with privilege. She didn't go to her dream school, but she made the most of where she attended.

My hope for my kids is not that they have connections with rich alumni at Fortune 500 companies — it's that they find meaningful work in their communities, become caring and dedicated people, and surround themselves with others who do the same. That goal can be met at any institution.