I left my job to become a stay-at-home dad. I now have the best job in the world.
- I am a stay-at-home dad to my two children.
- My wife and I decided one of us had to stay home after finding our unattended son covered in spit-up.
As my son prepared to sleep, he wrapped his arms around my neck and whispered, "You're the best dad in the world."
While many fathers will receive Father's Day mugs proclaiming them the "best" or "No. 1" dad, I've already earned the endorsement that matters most. It's doubly meaningful because I'm fortunate enough to be the world's best dad full time as a stay-at-home father.
Affordable day care is a struggle for many in America. Good, reliable day care is even harder to find. After we found our son covered in spit-up and unattended at his day care, my wife and I came to a difficult decision.
What if one of us stayed home? What if it was me? As a teacher, I worked long hours for far less money than my wife. The choice seemed logical. Yet it remained a terrifying prospect. It felt like I was abandoning the career I'd worked for. I also wondered if I would be able to stand the pressure of being at home all day with the kids.
It's not an easy job
Being a stay-at-home parent isn't easy. You're a teacher, entertainer, zookeeper, circus trainer, cleaning service, chef, and more. There are no sick days, and the job is constant, even at night.
Some days, it's all screaming, mind-numbing torture. Some days, you need a break. And there's a stigma against dads doing a job that isn't valued in our society.
I grimaced during comments about my "retirement" or my "unemployed" status. I winced at the places that offered changing stations in the women's rooms only. I froze beneath suspicious looks when I — the only dad — arrived at library story time.
More dads are choosing to stay at home
There are over 1.5 million stay-at-home dads in the US, and the number continues to grow, especially as the pandemic has shifted work situations for many. CNBC reported 17% of at-home parents were dads before the pandemic, based on a Pew Research report, a percentage that has doubled in the past decade.
Shannon Carpenter, the author of the recently published book "The Ultimate Stay-At-Home Dad," encourages men who choose family first to ditch the stereotypes and embrace their love of the world's best job. Connecting with Carpenter introduced me to the concept of the "dadventure," and that's when the joy truly exploded.
Once a week, it's out of the house. Playgrounds and libraries aren't enough. We need to do things as kids and dad together. The dadventures are the ultimate bonding and teaching moments, and the biggest perks of the job. I get to go to zoos, museums, beaches, and more.
Even in the height of pandemic lockdowns, I strove to keep things amazing. On our first day of full lockdown, my son and I built a rocket and visited the planets with an invented song about them he still sings. We virtually toured the Louvre and then paused to make banana bread because, like countless people early in the pandemic, I was convinced banana bread would save us.
Becoming a parent changed my life. Choosing to stay at home as a parent enriched it beyond measure. I have thousands of memories I'd otherwise have missed. I cherish the smiles, the laughs, the songs, the games, and, yes, even the screams. I cherish them all because I cherish my kids.
My son's right, I am the best dad — at least to him — and I truly have the world's best job.