Everything Prince Harry and Meghan Markle have said about the royal family since stepping back from royal life
Talia Lakritz
- Prince Harry and Meghan Markle announced their decision to step back from royal life in 2020.
- They've shared details of their rift with the royal family in various interviews and statements.
In March 2021, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle spoke candidly about their rift with the royal family in a tell-all interview with Oprah Winfrey.
The couple dropped bombshell after bombshell in their CBS interview with Winfrey.
Meghan said Kate Middleton made her cry over a disagreement about flower-girl dresses, despite reports that Meghan was the one who made Kate cry. She also said she was "silenced" by the royal family and directed to never comment on false reports.
The idea that she was "protected" by the royal family crumbled soon after the marriage, she said.
"That was hard to reconcile because it was only once we were married and everything started to really worsen that I came to understand that not only was I not being protected, but that they were willing to lie to protect other members of the family," Meghan said. "They weren't willing to tell the truth to protect me and my husband."
Meghan also said that members of the royal family expressed "concerns and conversations" about how dark Archie's skin would be before he was born, and that the harsh media scrutiny from the British press affected her mental health to the point where she began having suicidal thoughts.
Harry added that "no one from my family ever said anything" about Markle's racist treatment from the press, "and that hurts."
When Winfrey asked about reconciliation, Harry said that no royal family members had reached out to make amends.
"The feeling is that this was our decision. Therefore the consequences are on us," Harry said. "And despite three years of asking for help and visualizing how this might end — it's been really hard."
When Prince Philip died in April 2021, Harry released a statement remembering his grandfather as "cheeky right 'til the end."
"My grandfather was a man of service, honor and great humor," he said in a statement sent to Insider's Kelly McLaughlin and Armani Syed in April 2021. "He was authentically himself, with a seriously sharp wit, and could hold the attention of any room due to his charm — and also because you never knew what he might say next."
"He will be remembered as the longest reigning consort to the Monarch, a decorated serviceman, a Prince and a Duke. But to me, like many of you who have lost a loved one or grandparent over the pain of this past year, he was my grandpa: master of the barbecue, legend of banter, and cheeky right 'til the end," it continued.
"He has been a rock for Her Majesty The Queen with unparalleled devotion, by her side for 73 years of marriage, and while I could go on, I know that right now he would say to all of us, beer in hand, 'Oh do get on with it!'
"So, on that note, Grandpa, thank you for your service, your dedication to Granny, and for always being yourself. You will be sorely missed, but always remembered—by the nation and the world. Meghan, Archie, and I (as well as your future great-granddaughter) will always hold a special place for you in our hearts."
On an episode on Dax Shepard's podcast, "Armchair Expert," in May 2021, Harry spoke about the "genetic pain and suffering" that he said has been passed down in his family.
On the podcast episode, the Duke of Sussex opened up about his mental health and said he did not want to pass on the pain he experienced during his upbringing to his children.
"I don't think we should be pointing the finger or blaming anybody, but certainly when it comes to parenting," he told cohosts Dax Shepard and Monica Padman. "If I've experienced some form of pain or suffering because of the pain or suffering that perhaps my father or my parents had suffered, I'm going to make sure I break that cycle so that I don't pass it on, basically."
He later added, "It's a lot of genetic pain and suffering that gets passed on anyway so we as parents should be doing the most we can to try and say, 'You know what, that happened to me, I'm going to make sure that doesn't happen to you.'"
In the Apple TV+ series "The Me You Can't See," which premiered that same month, Harry continued the conversation about generational trauma in the royal family.
The Duke of Sussex spoke with Winfrey about his struggles growing up and his relationship with his father on the first episode of "The Me You Can't See," an Apple+ docuseries he co-created and executive produced with her.
"My father used to say to me, when I was younger, he used to say to both William and I, 'Well, it was like that for me. So it's going to be like that for you.' That doesn't make sense — just because you suffered it doesn't mean that your kids have to suffer," he said.
"In fact, quite the opposite. If you suffered, do everything you can to make sure that whatever negative experiences that you had, that you can make it right for your kids. We chose to put our mental health first. That's what we're doing. And that's what we will continue to do. Isn't this all about breaking the cycle? Isn't it all about making sure that history doesn't repeat itself? That whatever pain and suffering has happened to you, that you don't pass on."
He also talked about his and Meghan's decision to step back from royal life, saying that their requests for help and support were met with "total silence, total neglect."
"I was ashamed that it had got this bad," he said. "I was ashamed to go to my family because — to be honest with you, like a lot of other people my age could probably relate to — I know that I'm not going to get from my family what I need."
In an April interview with the "Today" show at the Invictus Games, Harry spoke about visiting Queen Elizabeth, but dodged a question about his father and brother.
Harry told Hoda Kotb that he and Meghan had tea with the Queen during their most recent visit to the UK.
"Being with her, it was great," he said. "It was just so nice to see her. She's in great form, she's always got a great sense of humor with me."
He later added, "We have a really special relationship. We talk about things that she can't talk about with anybody else."
Harry changed the subject when Kotb asked if he missed his family, specifically King Charles and Prince William.
"At the moment, I'm here focused on these guys and these families and giving everything I can, 120% to them to make sure that they have the experience of a lifetime," he said of his involvement with veterans and military families in the Invictus Games. "That's my focus here."
On the first episode of her podcast "Archetypes" released in August, Meghan recalled having to carry on with a royal engagement after Archie's nursery caught fire during their South Africa tour.
On the podcast episode with Serena Williams, Meghan said that a heater at the nursery where Archie was staying with his nanny caught fire during their royal tour of South Africa in September 2019. Archie was unharmed, but the incident left Meghan shaken.
"Everyone's in tears, everyone's shaken. And what do we have to do? Go out and do another official engagement? I said, 'This doesn't make any sense,'" Meghan said. "I was like, 'Can you just tell people what happened?' And so much, I think, optically, the focus ends up being on how it looks instead of how it feels."
Meghan told The Cut in August that she's "really made an active effort" to forgive her royal in-laws.
Meghan told The Cut that she and Harry had requested to eschew taxpayer funds and earn their own money in another Commonwealth country in order to curtail abuse from the UK press, but "that, for whatever reason, is not something that we were allowed to do, even though several other members of the family do that exact thing."
"Just by existing, we were upsetting the dynamic of the hierarchy," she said.
When asked if there was room for forgiveness between her and the royal family, Meghan replied, "I think forgiveness is really important. It takes a lot more energy to not forgive. But it takes a lot of effort to forgive. I've really made an active effort, especially knowing that I can say anything."
When Queen Elizabeth died in September, Harry released a statement remembering his "Granny" and recognizing his father as the new king.
In a statement shared on Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's Archewell website, Harry reflected on his favorite memories with the British monarch.
"In celebrating the life of my grandmother, Her Majesty The Queen—and in mourning her loss—we are all reminded of the guiding compass she was to so many in her commitment to service and duty," the statement began.
"She was globally admired and respected. Her unwavering grace and dignity remained true throughout her life and now her everlasting legacy," he added. "Let us echo the words she spoke after the passing of her husband, Prince Philip, words which can bring comfort to all of us now: 'Life, of course, consists of final partings as well as first meetings.'"
The statement went on: "Granny, while this final parting brings us great sadness, I am forever grateful for all of our first meetings—from my earliest childhood memories with you, to meeting you for the first time as my Commander-in-Chief, to the first moment you met my darling wife and hugged your beloved great-grandchildren."
"I cherish these times shared with you, and the many other special moments in between. You are already sorely missed, not just by us, but by the world over. And as it comes to first meetings, we now honour my father in his new role as King Charles III," he added.
"Thank you for your commitment to service. Thank you for your sound advice. Thank you for your infectious smile," he wrote. "We, too, smile knowing that you and grandpa are reunited now, and both together in peace."
In October, Meghan Markle reflected on her relationship with Queen Elizabeth in an interview with Variety.
"Certainly, in terms of female leadership, she is the most shining example of what that looks like," Meghan told Variety of Queen Elizabeth's legacy. "I feel deep gratitude to have been able to spend time with her and get to know her. It's been a complicated time, but my husband, ever the optimist, said, 'Now she's reunited with her husband.'"
She added, "I've reflected on that first official engagement that I had with her, how special that felt. I feel fortunate. And I continue to be proud to have had a nice warmth with the matriarch of the family."
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