An influencer whose books encourage women to find strength in being alone says quarantine can be an opportunity for self-betterment

• Chidera Eggerue is a self-help author who started publishing after becoming an influential blogger under the name "The Slumflower," writing about self-love and body acceptance.
• Now, her latest book "How To Get Over A Boy" and her 2018 book "What a Time to Be Alone" have taken on new relevancy as readers grapple with solitude and isolation during quarantine.
• Eggerue told Insider she's using her own self-isolation as a time to reflect and hopes that her writing provides comfort to women who are un-learning toxic patterns of thinking about themselves.
• Visit Insider's homepage for more stories.

There's been a subtle shift noticeable on "@theslumflower," the Instagram page with over 275,000 followers operated by self-help author Chidera Eggerue. Before March 17, in addition to photos taken in home loungewear, Eggerue posted lots of snapshots of herself on city streets, sipping cocktails, and speaking to crowds. She wore a lot of bright lipstick paired with smoky eyeshadow and defined brows.

Now, while self-isolated in her London apartment, Eggerue has kept posting pictures – there's one of her laughing in sunglasses on the floor, a black-and-white shot of her perched on a chair, and a photo of her on a plush red lounge chair. But she's not wearing makeup anymore.

"I'm someone who wears a lot of makeup," she told Insider over the phone. "It makes me feel good when I wear makeup. I love leaving a good impression, I love making an effort and communicating silently to someone that I care about what I'm doing, that I care about how I look, therefore you should take me seriously.

"But obviously in a time like this where I'm not going out, I'm not doing a job, there's not a reason for me to wear makeup. It opens up a question of when we say we wear makeup for ourselves, what do we really mean? For me, I feel like it's okay if you wear makeup to impress other people."

Taking a philosophical approach to ditching a conventional feminine expectation during a time of solitude is something Eggerue became an expert at well before she was forced to re-examine her philosophies during quarantine. The influencer has published two self-help books intended to advise women on self-love and unlearning the behaviors and patterns of thought imposed on them by a patriarchal society. To Eggerue, that often looks like solitude.

Both of Eggerue's books resonate with her now-isolated female readers because they advise women to seek independence.

Eggerue's most recent book, "How To Get Over A Boy," was written to inspire (specifically straight) women to "put themselves first more often, feel way less guilty about it, and ultimately move closer toward a life that actually exists on your terms as opposed to compromising for the sake of having some guy in your life."

She's noticed that during quarantine that some of her female peers have grappled with being truly alone – but Eggerue said she prefers to be by herself, and adapting to isolation has been a part of her evolution.

"Truthfully, seeing so many people lamenting over having to self-isolate without their boyfriend or their partner, or seeing a lot of straight women saying they're waking up every day feeling bereaved about not being able to see their partner, made me realize how free I am, because I don't feel that way about men," she said. "I've allowed myself to cultivate a freedom where the presence or absence of a man in my life doesn't affect the quality of it, and it shouldn't."

Her debut book in 2018 is aptly titled "What a Time to Be Alone," and it encourages readers to connect more deeply with their own thoughts and reflect on their relationships with others. It's also appeared on "best of" quarantine reading lists, given that we no longer have much of a choice than to isolate from the people around us.

"Both books provide comfort, and when we're in a situation like this where we are left alone with our thoughts, especially those who are quarantining solo, I think people will be in a more receptive state of mind, as opposed to when we're all in our hustle and bustle," Eggerue said.

"I feel like by the time we come out of quarantine again, there will be so many people who have a different outlook on life, and they'll probably be making way better decisions for themselves than they would have."

As someone whose career involves mostly reflection and sharing the results of her own philosophizing with others, Eggerue has had plenty of time to debate with herself about her ideas and the self-betterment she's constantly striving for. Some influencers have struggled to maintain a public persona during quarantine, especially given the negative connotations associated with being an influencer already.

"The stigma comes from people who don't understand it, and the people who don't understand something are quick to dismiss it and label it as negative," Eggerue told Insider. "And often that's jealousy, because influencers are associated more positively with freedom and being able to make money on your terms, depending on what kind of influencer you are, and having the credibility of somewhat being able to monetize off something as effortless as being yourself."

Even though titles like "author," "fashion blogger," and "activist" (she started the online campaign "#saggyboobsmatter") may seem more credible than "influencer," especially during a time when influencing may seem unnecessary, Eggerue embraces the term, because she says her thoughts are influential, and that's a positive.

"Frida Kahlo, she was a painter, she was an artist, but she's also been considered an influencer. Look at what she's done to the art world just by existing and sharing her art. She's still influential," she said. "I'm never going to stop having thoughts and I'm never going to stop sharing those thoughts, just like most human beings, we love to think and share our ideas. In some cases that leads to introspection. I can't keep quiet about my ideas."

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