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A software engineer was fired after two women leaked his abusive and misogynistic Tinder messages online

Oct 6, 2020, 02:01 IST
Insider
Ebonie Sanderson shared the multiple abusive voice memos she received via Instagram.@eboniesand/Instagram
  • A 28-year-old Australian man lost his job as a software engineer after his former Tinder matches shared his messages publically.
  • Ebonie Sanderson and Erin Hinds posted screenshots from conversations with a man who went by "Tom" in which he insulted their appearance and shamed them for their sexual history.
  • The posts went viral and the Tinder messages eventually reached the man's employer.
  • The company terminated the software engineer and condemned his behavior.
  • Thomas McGuirk, the man behind the Tinder profile, admitted to the exchanges and says he's "distraught" by his actions.
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A software engineer from Australia was fired last week after two women made public the abusive and misogynistic messages they said he sent to them on dating apps and social media platforms, The Daily Mail reported.

26-year-old Ebonie Sanderson matched with "Tom" on Tinder, and the two began exchanging messages. The man repeatedly insisted that Sanderson come to his home, but she says she declined his requests. After articulating that she did not wish to waste his time, Sanderson received several cruel messages on multiple social media platforms — so she decided to speak out on Instagram.

"This is what happens when you say NO or call a man out for being disrespectful," she wrote in a post. "You apparently earn yourself the right to get verbally abused and fat shamed on more than one platform."

Sanderson went on to share videos of Tom's voice messages on the app, in which he can be heard calling her a "fat f---ing pig" and "f---ing ugly." She also shared screenshots of a Snapchat conversation where Tom said Sanders was "below him" and "inferior."

The situation, she said, highlighted a larger problem.

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"The worst part about this attack, is the fact that I felt the need to be nice when turning him down, telling him he's good looking and will find someone else for the night and then apologising for feeling uncomfortable!!!!" she wrote. "THAT IS A BIG PROBLEM."

Sanderson's photos and videos sparked outrage in the comments section from viewers who called her Tinder match's behavior "horrendous" and "evil."

Feminist author and broadcaster Clementine Ford shared Sanderson's story with her 116,000 Instagram followers.

"This is what male entitlement looks like. This is what male abuse looks like," Ford wrote in an Instagram post.

Ford also posted the man's Instagram handle — which identified him as a 28-year-old software engineer from Bondi named Thomas McGuirk — and encouraged Instagram users to avoid engaging with him on any platform. The Instagram profile has since been deleted.

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After Sanderson's story made headlines in Australia, several other women came forward to share similar experiences with the man

26-year-old Erin Hinds took to Instagram to share similar messages she'd received after declining McGuirk's advances.

The brewery manager wrote in a post that she had matched with McGuirk on Tinder a month prior. Ultimately, she said, she felt that the two didn't have chemistry.

She said his response to the rejection, however, quickly turned cruel.

In several messages that Hinds shared online, McGuirk shamed Hinds for her sexual history and appeared to threaten to show up at her place of business.

"I feel absolutely horrific and violated I never did anything," she wrote. "He was nice, until told no."

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Since posting photos of the interactions to Instagram, Hinds wrote in an updated caption that three other women came forward to share a similar experience with McGuirk. She said he'd sent disturbing messages to women "all over" the world, with women coming forward in London, England, and Sydney, Australia.

"It's time to put an end to this misogynistic bull----," she concluded.

A spokesperson for Tinder told Insider that McGuirks's profile had been reported and removed for violating the platform's terms of service.

Consequences for the messages went beyond a Tinder ban when McGuirk's employer discovered the posts

In an updated caption of her Instagram post, Sanderson informed followers that McGuirk had been fired by Invenco Ltd, a company specializing in e-commerce and logistics. The company, she said, had "acted quickly."

In a statement to News.com.au, a spokesperson for Invenco said that McGuirk had been terminated and that there was "no place in our workplace for someone who treats women with that amount of disrespect."

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Invenco CEO Dave Scott addressed the situation in a Facebook post, writing, "I was shocked and disgusted to hear the disrespect and entitlement towards women appear in the recordings and messages attached to the Instagram post."

After days of backlash, McGuirk apologized for his conduct

"I didn't mean the things I said, I was acting out in an impulsive way because I was hurt and I do recognize it," McGuirk told News.com.au. "It was absolutely inappropriate behavior and I'm really disappointed in myself."

The 28-year-old also told the outlet that he "struggles with rejection," and his response came from a place of anger and hurt.

"There's no excuse for it, I have been brought up with good values and I am so distraught that I let my ego get the better of me," he said.

The public outcry and resultant embarrassment, McGuirk explained, had been a wake-up call, and he plans to quit social media and says he will be seeking professional help to facilitate strong and healthy relationships.

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