A daughter built her 2 moms a 600-square-foot cottage in her backyard so they could all be closer to each other

After getting married, Zandonella-Stannard and her husband decided to buy a house, but she also wanted to provide a home for her two mothers as they got older.

"Living intergenerational is important, and it's something I always wanted my family to be able to do, especially as we were thinking of having a baby," she told Insider.

It was a small price to pay for having her parents close, though.

Meredith Stannard and Elyse Zandonella met as bus drivers while working in Seattle. Because marriage wasn't legal in Seattle during the '80s, they had a private commitment ceremony where they exchanged vows. The couple had Drew, their only child, via a donor.

"They were lesbians who decided to have a kid in the 80s, which was a pretty bold thing," she said. "I grew up in the LGBTQ community, and they're very active. It was a big deal just to have an unique family back then and be out and visible. We've been pretty visible my whole life."

Zandonella-Stannard said she had a great relationship with all three of her parents including her father, who passed away when she was in eighth grade.

They hired a specialist who worked in both homes for aging seniors, as well as backyard cottages. Tiny backyard homes had become a trend in Seattle, Zandonella-Stannard said, but most people chose to rent them out as vacation rentals.

Despite this, Zandonella-Stannard and her mothers prefer not to call it a tiny home or "a granny pod." Most of the tiny homes built in the area have a boxier design, she said, but the family wanted something that reflected a craftsman home.

"I hate to call it a tiny home because really it is a cottage," Zandonella-Stannard said. "They have a lot of space in there."

Their house had been built around 1910.

"Building an entire home in your backyard is a very strange experience, especially when it comes to figuring out electricity and plumbing. We had a sewer line that wasn't built in 1910 but pretty close to that era," Zandonella-Stannard said. "We dug up the backyard to establish a foundation. Our backyard used to be a community garbage pit back in the day."

They started in May 2016, and her moms were moved in by that November.

Zandonella-Stannard and her husband lived in their house during the construction process, but the experience didn't inconvenience them too much. At one point, though, the portable toilet did fall over in their yard.

"There was a lot of hijinks that happened," Zandonella-Stannard said. "I learned when porta-potties fall over there's a mechanism that shuts it so nothing spills out, which was really great."

"My family is a family of really strong personalities," she said. "[My parents] did what they wanted to, and it came out beautiful."

The cottage is quaint and cozy and the perfect size for Stannard and Zandonella.

A huge benefit to their unique living situation, Zandonella-Stannard said, is that they can be close together while having their own space at the same time.

"We open the basement door and run through the backyard and there they are," she said. "You can see them out of our kitchen window, which is really lovely. We give each other as much privacy as we need. They're not just letting themselves into our house."

Downstairs is the kitchen and living room, big enough for Stannard and Zandonella as well as any guests like Zandonella-Stannard and her family. Upstairs is the one bedroom they share as well as the bathroom.

"Ordering an entire kitchen from Ikea, the way it was delivered ... I was standing out in the darkness in the pouring rain, and this truck backed up on our street and dumped off 92 boxes of things from Ikea," Zandonella-Stannard said. She had to quickly find room for all the appliances until they could be unpacked.

"They used to have a lot of antique furniture. Antique furniture wasn't built for a small cottage," Zandonella-Stannard said. "I kept saying, 'Have you measured yet? Have you measured your furniture to make sure some of it is going to fit in there?'"

The couple sold or got rid of a lot of their furniture, but moving in was still a frustrating experience, in part because a storm created a mud pit in the backyard.

"The movers were bringing all this furniture in boxes," Drew recalled. "'Where are we going to put all of this? Nothing fits."'

It has even acted as a litmus test of sorts for her friends' own relationships with their parents.

"People either said, 'Oh my god, that's so wonderful I wish that I could do that,''" she said. "Or, 'Oh my god that is so terrible, I would never want my mom in my backyard.'"

"Having them here has been indispensable," Drew said. "It's changed my complete experience with motherhood for the better. I have that support. I think it's something people used to have a lot more of in previous generations, and we've moved away from that."

Zandonella-Stannard quit her full-time job when her daughter Frida was born, but she has recently started doing freelance work. Her mothers will watch Frida while she works downstairs in the office. This has especially been beneficial during the coronavirus pandemic when her husband has also been working from home.

"As she's gotten older, she loves going over there," Zandonella-Stannard said. "She absolutely always wants to go over to her grandparents' house because things are different. The idea of going to grandmas' house is so foreign and appealing."

Due to the coronavirus pandemic, the family hasn't been able to leave the house much, so it gives her daughter a change of scenery and allows her to go on an adventure. Given the stress of uncertain times, Drew is glad to have her parents there, acknowledging so many including her husband haven't been able to seen their parents recently.

"There is that piece of missing family, and that's another reason I'm so glad my parents are here," she said.

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