+

Cookies on the Business Insider India website

Business Insider India has updated its Privacy and Cookie policy. We use cookies to ensure that we give you the better experience on our website. If you continue without changing your settings, we\'ll assume that you are happy to receive all cookies on the Business Insider India website. However, you can change your cookie setting at any time by clicking on our Cookie Policy at any time. You can also see our Privacy Policy.

Close
HomeQuizzoneWhatsappShare Flash Reads
 

A 29-year-old shared a day in her life as a single woman with no kids. When she went viral, she was flooded with hate and abuse for her choices.

Sep 8, 2023, 20:00 IST
Insider
A single woman in her late twenties without kids was criticised for her lifestyle choices on social media.TikTok: @pmdpod, Julia Mazur
  • Julia Mazur listed the benefits of being a single woman in her late twenties without kids on TikTok.
  • The video was reposted by a large account on X, formerly Twitter, leading to a wave of abuse.
Advertisement

A TikToker who shared the perks of being a single woman without kids in her late twenties is facing a barrage of abuse after her video reached the wrong audience.

On September 3, Julia Mazur, a 29-year-old from Los Angeles, California, posted a TikTok where she described how her Saturday was unfolding as she had no husband and no kids, and no errands to worry about.

After attending a Beyoncé concert the night before, Mazur said she was able to sleep in until gone 10 a.m. and scroll on her phone in bed, with no urgency to get up. She added she had spontaneously decided to learn how to make shakshuka for breakfast and that she'd likely spend a portion of her day watching TV.

Towards the end of the TikTok, Mazur said she was sharing this to remind herself that she wouldn't want to do anything else with her Saturday, as she sometimes questioned why she wasn't married with kids and "further along" in her life as she neared 30.

"The effortlessness and ease of my life, just kind of focusing on myself and the shakshuka I wanna make, or the Beyoncé concert I wanna go to, really pays off when I'm hard on myself for not being where society tells me I should be in life," she said in the video.

Advertisement

Mazur told Insider in an email exchange "the reactions were extremely positive" when she initially uploaded the video, which to date has over 480,000 views and 5,200 comments on TikTok, where the majority appeared to support Mazur's Saturday routine, and wrote they could relate to her feelings.

However, the reaction took a turn when the video was reposted and sparked an online pile-on.

A prominent X user with a large following reposted the video and criticized Mazur

On September 3, the clip was posted to the social media platform X (formerly Twitter) by a user who goes by Josh Lekach, who said he was "not impressed" with Mazur. The video received 1.9 million views, and was reshared by the right-wing political commentator Matt Walsh to 2.4 million followers.

He wrote, "Her life doesn't revolve around her family and kids so instead it revolves around TV shows and pop stars. Worst of all she's too stupid to realize how depressing this is."

The post garnered over 34 million views, and 3,600 quote reposts including those who also criticized Mazur's single Saturday routine, dubbing her life "meaningless," calling her names, and making misogynistic comments.

Advertisement

Mazur told Insider that people she knew were texting her to see if she was OK, and advising her to stay off X, which she tried to do, but she said people began tracking her down other social media accounts and leaving abusive comments. In a screenshot seen by Insider, one user commented on multiple Instagram photos, using slurs against Mazure and telling her to, "have fun dying alone in regret."

"That's when I decided to delete the TikTok app on my phone to protect my mental health," Mazur said, but things started looking up when she realized she had support too.

Lots of users took digs at her critics and expressed shock at the negativity and abuse being hurled towards Mazur, including businessman and TV personality Mark Cuban and Washington Post journalist Jules Terpak.

"That made me feel safe to come back to the internet and make my rebuttal video on TikTok, which led to a lot of public support which I am so unbelievably grateful for," Mazur told Insider.

Walsh did not immediately respond to Insider's request for comment.

Advertisement

Mazur wants to spread the message that it's OK to reject social norms

Mazur currently typically posts videos about her daily routine living alone, aspects of a single life she's not ready to give up, and lighthearted responses for those who are quizzed on why they're not in a relationship.

On September 5, she returned to TikTok with a post where she updated her viewers on the way she had been "bullied" by X users and described their behavior as "abhorrent," but said she makes videos for those "taking their time creating the lives that they want for themselves."

"I grew up in a Russian Jewish household where a lot of the rhetoric from family and friends was that I should settle down, find a nice husband, and have kids," Mazur told Insider. "I watched a lot of my friends get married and have children and I tried to do the same. Society has adopted this idea that the ideal of happiness is a traditional marriage."

She said she'd felt pressure to get married in her twenties and pursued relationships that were "good on paper," but it left her "deeply unhappy and unfulfilled" and she felt like she was simply "checking off a box to appease other people."

Mazur's response TikTok received 2 million views and over 8,300 comments, many of which applauded Mazur for her message, and shared they too had a similar perspective, or that they had opted to have kids but still felt Mazur and others had the freedom to make their own decisions, and wondered why the viewpoint was even considered controversial by some.

Advertisement

In a further follow-up posted on September 8, Mazur said the abuse had continued days later and she almost had to close one eye to shield herself from the "mean" comments, but thanked the "incredibly kind people" who came to her support.

For more stories like this, check out coverage from Insider's Digital Culture team here.

You are subscribed to notifications!
Looks like you've blocked notifications!
Next Article