9 people share the biggest thing they've learned about their partner while spending every day together in quarantine

Nita and Ed Sweeney, 58 and 78 respectively, live in Upper Arlington, Ohio and have been married for 28 years. They are spending their quarantine a bit differently than most people they know.

"We didn't expect our isolation to include him facing complications from open heart surgery and me turning into an accidental home health aide," Nita, a lawyer-turned-author, told Insider. "Instead of lamenting the book readings and political gatherings we can't attend, we are in a home health bubble with him on a gastric feeding tube and me learning to operate the pump, change dressings, crush pills, and treat bedsores and thrush."

The author of several books, including "Depression Hates a Moving Target," she said their marriage was strong before this, but that this experience has given a new definition to "in sickness and in health."

"The number one thing I've learned about Ed is how determined he is to get well," she said. "I knew he was strong-willed and driven, but watching him work so hard to recover, and seeing how much he wants to be well again, brought new insight. You would think he was training for a marathon the way he follows the regimen the therapists have laid out for him."

She said he walks laps around the house with his walker, uses ankle weights to do leg lifts in his recliner, and does hand and throat exercises to regain the use of his left hand and retrain his swallowing muscles.

"I look forward to the day when I can agonize over not being able to go to the grocery without a mask," Nita said. "But right now, I'm more concerned about my husband's vital signs and I find myself doing things I never thought I could — but love will always find a way."

Gabriella Israel and her husband, Mike Grinberg, are both 35 and have their own company, a fully remote B2B digital marketing agency, Proofpoint Marketing. They're based in Minneapolis, Minnesota and are quarantining with their 4-year-old daughter, Lana, and 10-year-old dog.

"My husband and I work from home normally, but during this COVID-19 pandemic, our work from home situation got a whole lot messier, crazier, and definitely a lot more stressful," Israel told Insider.

She said their daughter would normally be in pre-school for half the day and then with a nanny for the second half of the day. But because Lana has a complex medical history, including weakened lungs and other medical needs after having been born at 24 weeks, they pulled her out of school even earlier than the official shelter-in-place order began.

Israel and her husband try to split up the day evenly, with one of them working while the other is with Lana. They'll eat lunch as a family, then swap roles. At night, they'll take turns putting her to bed and the other will put in a few more work hours.

"One of the things that I've realized about Mike is that he really thrives and shines through chaos," Israel said. "He's been waking up at 6 a.m. every day to work out, take the dog for a walk, and prepare breakfast before Lana and I even wake up. He's also been shining online as a business leader in his LinkedIn network, and he's been an incredible connector during this time."

Israel said that aside from her husband calling his friends and relatives to check in with them, he's been contacting hers, too. Plus, he's been doing things around the house that Israel would normally have to ask more than once to get his help with, she said, like doing the dishes, taking out the trash, and preparing meals for their daughter.

"With his back against the wall, I've learned that Mike can really deliver under pressure," she said. "While his chipper attitude has been irritating at times — I am not nearly as motivated as he is right now — I am really proud and grateful to have a partner who is helping to carry the mental and emotional load not only for our family life, but also, most importantly, in our business."

Joseph Gorordo and Chelsea MacDonald, 35 and 31 respectively, live in Austin, Texas with their three children, ages 2, 8, and 10. Gorordo and MacDonald have been together for 12 years and married for nine. While he is a licensed chemical dependency counselor, she is a stay-at-home mom and yoga teacher.

"I've learned a lot about myself and my family during this quarantine," Gorordo told Insider. "In particular, I've learned that my wife is an amazing cheerleader. With our two older children transitioning to online schooling, they have expressed frustration and sadness, but my wife has been there every step of the way, filling them with words of encouragement and support."

He said that she not only encourages the children, but him, as well.

"I've started several hobbies and projects, such as gardening, bread making, woodworking, and even built a concrete paver patio, which my 10-year-old really enjoyed, too," he said. "All these projects have come with some mistakes and frustrations, but Chelsea has consistently pushed and motivated me to keep trying."

Gina Daniel, 27, and Kyle Holt, 25, have been dating for four years and have lived together since last October. The couple are quarantined in Liverpool in Merseyside, England. Daniel works from home as a writer while Holt works as a musician — as a result, she loves that he's introduced her to many new artists during the lockdown.

Although they love many of the same things, Daniel told Insider, from types of films and food to reading and gaming, they're also learning a lot about each other through all their recent togetherness. When it comes to the most surprising thing she's learning about her boyfriend, Daniel said it's definitely his love language.

"He shows affection through loving gestures, but also through work," she said. "He does simple tasks around the flat that make my day easier, like taking out the rubbish or simply making me a coffee."

Before buying their house, for the majority of their relationship, they lived apart and only saw each other 1-2 times per week.

"It's nice to have so much time together and I'm really glad we've ended up together through this time in our lives," Daniel said. "We've only argued once or twice — and just about housework."

Marissa Johnson, 30, and Brett Charest, 42, are engaged and have been together since 2015. They recently moved from Los Angeles to Canyon Lake, California.

"We have a lakefront home and I can't imagine a more beautiful setting to be quarantined," she told Insider. "We also couldn't imagine going through this alone, without each other, especially with our wedding hanging in the distance this June."

Through being home together 24/7, Johnson said she's learned more about Charest's day-to-day office life, from how many conference calls he has to how they vary in tone from serious to less so. As a result, she's learned to be cognizant of how much noise she makes so she doesn't interfere with his work day.

"Before quarantine, when I'd be home by myself while he's at the office, I tended to spend a lot more time watching TV and on my phone," she said. "But now, I find myself spending more time doing things around the house, like making stepping stones for the backyard, and being creative. I think it has a lot to do with me wanting to feel like, 'See what I did today?'"

Paige Arnof-Fenn, 54, has known her husband, 61-year-old George, for 34 years, and the two have been married for 28. They live in Cambridge, Massachusetts, where she founded her global branding and marketing firm, Mavens & Moguls, 19 years ago.

She told Insider that they've been through a lot together, including three cross-country moves, losing and changing jobs, starting companies, losing seven close family members in six years, and several health scares.

Through it all, she's seen her husband rise to the occasion and handle each crisis in an amazing way — staying clearheaded, calm, and showing compassion, kindness, and an ability to think strategically under tremendous pressure.

"This lockdown is not our first rodeo, but it has been a challenge indeed and we never saw it coming," she said. "The number one thing I am reminded of is that George is a gem and I am incredibly lucky. He makes every situation, even quarantine, better, and always keeps priorities in check. It makes me love and appreciate him even more, if that is even possible."

All in all, Arnof-Fenn said she knows she can always trust him when the chips are down.

"When this crisis is over, we'll find a way to incorporate the lessons of gratitude, simplicity, friendship and love into the new normal and I will be incredibly happy that we did not waste the crisis," she said. "If we can hold onto the very best parts of this lockdown, the world will be a better place for it."

Katie and Taylor Bell, 33 and 28 respectively, of Jackson, Tennessee have been married for five years and been together for six. With two young children, a 3-year-old and 15-month-old, the four spend almost 24/7 together these days.

By day, Katie runs her company, Katie Bell Communications, which she's done from home for years. Her husband, however, is new to working remotely — he's a clinical mental health therapist for a youth outpatient facility.

The two have a pretty good system going, she told Insider: he'll work in the morning while she's with the kids, they'll break for lunch, and then the kids will nap when Katie begins working in the afternoon.

"My husband has always been a super involved dad, but he's stepped up his game even more these days, handling baths and diaper changes and getting yet another snack like a champ," said Katie. "We make a good team because when one of us is exhausted or having a rough moment, the other steps in and takes over for a bit."

After the work part of their day is over, they'll spend quality family time together, she said, either taking a long walk or playing outside. But they've also started taking some time to do their own thing for an hour or so each day.

"With this quarantine, I have learned that my husband needs space and time to just relax, whatever that looks like for him, which is often different than what that looks like for me," she said. "For me, it's a walk solo, a long shower, or a call with a friend. For him, that looks like hitting golf balls into his net in the backyard or playing a video game for an hour. Then he comes back refreshed and present."

Derek and Marissa Eligio, 30 and 29 respectively, met at work in 2013 and started dating the following year. In 2015, they moved in together and also switched jobs: he started a sales company while she began working for Carvana.

In December 2018, the Mesa, Arizona couple got married and are now building a relationship coaching business together where they focus on helping couples balance their work demands and relationship.

"What we have learned about each other since the quarantine began is that we need to use space and time to meet our individual needs," Derek told Insider. "For example, Marissa is very structured and needs to plan and schedule her more important tasks. Me, on the other hand, I am more flexible, so it is easy for me to transition between work and down time without feeling overwhelmed and stressed."

As a result, he said their varying work styles have made them be more strategic, and they've created boundaries during work hours.

"I learned I should not interrupt her when I am distracted or bored, because it throws her off and adds more stress for her," he said. "But every day, we take an hour lunch with each other and play card games. This helps break up both of our days and helps us find that balance between being productive, but also appreciating the time we have together right now."

Houston, Texas-based Laureen and Ben Lucas, both 38, have been married for 15 years.

While Laureen's accustomed to working from home running her PR business, LL Communications, LLC, and blog, LaureenLoves.com, it's the first time she's seen Ben work remotely. He works as a drilling engineer for a large oil company and has used a home office for about four weeks now.

"While I have known he is a productive person, the number one thing I've learned about my husband is that he is highly efficient and focused in his work life," Laureen told Insider. "Listening to him on the phone — troubleshooting issues and addressing concerns from leadership — has been eye-opening, honestly. It's impressive and makes me proud to be his other half."

The couple have two children, a 5-year-old and 21-month-old, who are very developmentally different because of their ages and personalities, Laureen said. But she's discovered that having a partner who is efficient and focused in their work life has its advantages for their marriage and family life, too.

"He can accomplish what he needs to do so he has more time for doing things to help maintain our home or can pick up the slack with childcare, which is especially helpful during this quarantine period," she said. "His helpfulness is invaluable to me."