10 red flags that a couple might not make it, according to wedding planners

Insider spoke to Leora Soleymani, founder and owner of Best Bride, a wedding-planning company based in Los Angeles, California, and a partner of Wedaways. As a wedding planner for nine years, Soleymani has "seen it all," she said, and disagreements about the wedding budget always stand out to her as major red flags.

"A lot of couples, most oftentimes the brides, aren't realistic about what they can afford. Forget the wedding — if one partner is so in the clouds about what they can afford, just imagine their future life," she said.

Another wedding planner agreed, telling Insider, "Planning a wedding is a huge budgeting conversation and is a big test for couples."

Ashley Douglass of Ashley Douglass Events said budget issues need to be understood and addressed.

"One of the two may be coming from a very different socio-economical background, so when it comes to weddings they have seen different weddings than their spouse," she said. "Some may need a reality check and to be reminded that a wedding is not a competition to fit in with the cool crowd. No one is judging you ... You don't want buyer's remorse after your most special day."

"One big red flag with couples is when they have no respect for each other — either the bride or groom will want a certain thing, and the other person will put them down for it, saying something along the lines of, 'Ew, why do you want to do that?' rather than saying, 'Let's talk about it and come to a solution together,'" Soleymani said.

She added, "I really do see some relationships that aren't healthy, and I wonder if they're going to make it or not."

But not every fight indicates there's a bigger problem, Douglass said.

"When a couple fights, even if they fight often, I don't always see that as a negative," Ashley Douglass said. "It's how they fight. It just feels different from couple to couple."

"I've worked with a few couples where only the bride is interested in the planning and the details of the wedding, meanwhile the groom won't take an interest in it at all," said one wedding planner, who chose to remain anonymous.

"With a lot of couples, one person is usually more interested in the planning than the other, but most of the time their partner will at least humor them and try to be there for meetings and give their input even if it's not 'their thing.' I worked with one couple where the groom wasn't involved at all, to the point where I thought, 'Do you even have a fiancé?' I found that really sad."

A partner who is overly controlling during the wedding-planning process may be that way in the marriage, too, said Soleymani.

"They're going to want to know where you're shopping, how much you're spending, why you did that, why you didn't choose this, compared to someone who doesn't care that much or has a more laid-back attitude," she said.

"If one member of the couple doesn't get along with the other side of the family, that doesn't necessarily mean their relationship will never work, but it's very telling of how their married life will be and potential conflicts within it," said one wedding planner. "Any stress or drama you're dealing with during the wedding planning is very telling of interactions you'll have down the line."

Leora Soleymani also pointed out that a lack of healthy communication skills is a huge red flag. Being passive-aggressive or fighting over minor details could suggest larger relationship problems down the line.

"There are obviously going to be bigger decisions in life than what color florals you'll have, the type of linens you'll use, or which band you're going to hire for your wedding. How couples communicate with each other during this time is really important and says a lot about their relationship," she said.

"You shouldn't be crying to me," said Soleymani. "You should be crying to your fiancé. In a healthy relationship, they should be the one to calm you down or give you the peace you need. If they're the ones aggravating the situation, that's not a good sign."

If you're using your wedding planner as the go-between or middleman, that's never a good sign.

"I've had couples ask me to lie to their partner and say something they want isn't available because they didn't want it or didn't want to pay for it," said Soleymani.

"Some people are just not very nice, and I can tell by the way they treat me," said Soleymani. "Some brides or grooms are just very rude — they don't say thank you, they complain, they see the bad in everything, or they are just mean ... Planning your wedding is supposed to be a happy time, so if you can't see the good in the most incredible time in your life, when will you?"

"I've had couples break down during the wedding-planning process. They're frustrated with everything, and maybe want to call it off, but they'll say, 'We've come this far, we're about to be married, we've invested so much money, and we have to do it,'" Soleymani told Insider. "Unfortunately, I've seen a couple go through with the wedding and not go through with the marriage.

"It was clear that they weren't in love and were just going through with it because they wanted to be married and it was what their families wanted and expected. 'Here's a good girl,' or 'here's a good guy,' and they try to convince themselves it's right. It's very sad to see."