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Quitting fantasies are fun, but not realistic.
- Julia Wuench is the founder of The Authenticity Guide, a positive-psychology-based career and executive coaching firm that empowers individuals to harness their authenticity to improve life and work.
- She says that having quitting fantasies about leaving your job can be very common, especially on days when everything seems to be going wrong.
- But instead of abruptly calling it quits, Wuench says to use these fantasies as an opportunity to redirect your energy and refocus on new productive and healthy activities.
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In the years leading up to leaving my corporate job, I used to have vivid "quitting fantasies." I would daydream about all of the ways that I would storm into my boss's office, cite my well-memorized list of the ways I had been wronged and that the company was doomed and toxic, and then I would announce my resignation - effective immediately. I would promptly change into my flip flops and go to the beach, and then I would sleep and watch Netflix for weeks straight.
Courtesy of Julia Wuench
Julia Wuench.
The reason I call this a quitting fantasy is because it's just that. It's fun to think about quitting on hard days at the office, but it's not reasonable to actually carry out (for most of us, anyway). Even though I was miserable at work, I knew I didn't want to burn bridges with my colleagues, and I did not have a backup plan.
Now that I coach professionals, I have found that even people who are mostly happy with their jobs have quitting fantasies. It's normal to want to bow out when things get tough, stressful, or even boring - and it's especially tempting to want to storm out on a day when everything seems to be going wrong.
"Bad days are, of course, when we feel like quitting," said Angela Duckworth, founder and CEO of the nonprofit Character Lab, and author of "Grit." "But on a bad day, our failures, setbacks, and opponents loom larger than they would on a good or even neutral day. So my advice is not to quit on a bad day, and to make sure you have a confidante or mentor who cares enough about you not to let you quit on a bad day."
So, how can we direct our energies elsewhere while staying in our day jobs, at least for now?
When you're having these feelings, but quitting imminently isn't the right decision for you, here are some healthy activities you can focus on instead of that "ways I've been wronged" list.