Talking with Queen Elizabeth II taught me a powerful lesson about the art of conversation

Prepare yourself for any discussion, meeting, or negotiation by researching the background and life details of the person with whom you are meeting. If you do not do this, you may be walking in blind to a situation that could waste time for everyone because you are ignorant of what the other person is bringing to the table.

This research is easy to conduct online. Once the meeting starts, you can deploy the information strategically to show that you took the time to learn more about the individual prior to the meeting.

When I worked in the White House, we prepared the president with extensive briefing books about the people with whom he was meeting. We also produced videos illustrating how the other leaders walked, talked, and conducted themselves in various situations.

This brought a high degree of texture to the person being profiled and contributed to the success of many bi-lateral meetings.

You may not be the president, but you can utilize the same principles and access a good deal of data about the individuals in your meeting.

When I am meeting someone for the first time, I put my curiosity to work. I usually ask them where they were born and brought up.

Do they have siblings? How long have they worked in their current capacity and how did they get into it? People are usually flattered by your asking these questions — if they are sincere.

Ask these questions because you're genuinely interested in hearing the answers. If you are listening carefully, you can suggest a follow up, and soon you'll gain their confidence.

Most people like to talk about themselves and will not find it difficult to tell you helpful personal stories, if you ask the right way. These insights are indispensable in negotiation.

This article was original republished on Business Insider March 24, 2015.