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  5. When I was 28, my back pain was so bad that I couldn't have sex with my new husband or even complete simple tasks. I needed to treat my physical and mental health together.

When I was 28, my back pain was so bad that I couldn't have sex with my new husband or even complete simple tasks. I needed to treat my physical and mental health together.

Lauren Crosby Medlicott   

When I was 28, my back pain was so bad that I couldn't have sex with my new husband or even complete simple tasks. I needed to treat my physical and mental health together.
Science3 min read
  • Val Sabate is a 29-year-old whose sudden back pain sidelined her for a year.
  • She was treated with steroid injections, regenerative medicine, and physical therapy.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Val Sabate. It has been edited for length and clarity.

In the spring of 2021, I decided to introduce a pair of 5-pound ankle weights to my home workout. Though it had been a while since I'd dedicated time to exercise, I'd been a competitive gymnast for 10 years and was ready to get strong again after a busy season of working and getting married.

To my total surprise, I woke up the next day with a constant, severe pain that wrapped like a belt around the bottom of my back. I couldn't stand. I couldn't sit for even five minutes. And I couldn't sleep.

Even though I'd had injuries during my time as a gymnast, this pain was worse than any I'd ever experienced.

The pain didn't budge

I went to the chiropractor first, thinking something was just tense. That didn't work. Then I went for physical therapy, but they didn't know what was going on. The pain just wasn't going away.

Furiously researching solutions, I stumbled upon the Virginia Spine Institute and saw that they had experience working with ex-athletes. It was where I wanted to get treatment. In the summer of 2021 I met Dr. Ehsan Jazini, who diagnosed me with problems in my sacroiliac joints, facets, and ligaments at two levels of my spine. He started treating me with steroid injections and regenerative medicine. I was also set up with a physical therapist for aquatic and physical therapy.

In the beginning, it felt like we were just trying to figure out where the pain was coming from. In those early days, the pain was not alleviating.

The pain affected my job and my relationship

At this point, I had been in pain for about six months. I was scared I would lose my job. I'm a PR person who has to attend lots of events and work crazy hours. Luckily, my employer understood and let me work flexibly as long as I met my deadlines, so I was able to work lying in bed.

The pain also took a toll on life at home. I had been married for only a short time when the back pain started. I went from being an active person to needing my husband's help to sit on the toilet and shave my legs. I couldn't help around the house at all. We even had to put off having sex for a time because it was just too painful.

There were times I got scared that my husband might not stay because I just wasn't getting better, even though he was such a support to me the whole time. I felt so guilty. I wanted to be independent. I didn't want to be a burden. But it just wasn't within my control. There were a few times I just thought I couldn't carry on, that it was all too much.

My mental health needed help too

I had been trying to keep afloat with the physical stuff and didn't think I had time for the mental-health challenges I was facing. But then my hair started falling out as a result of anxiety and depression. I had to accept that I wasn't doing well and that I needed help.

In January 2022, I contacted a therapist for weekly remote sessions and was put on antidepressants. I made sure I was put on a medication that wouldn't mask pain, as I needed to stay tuned in and measure progress by my pain levels.

All of a sudden, my recovery progressed from little baby steps to big leaps. I started using weights, had more mobility, and could walk more. I truly believe that mental-health support was the last piece of the puzzle to speed up my recovery.

I remember waking up one morning amazed I'd actually been able to sleep. It felt like we were finally breaking the cycle of pain. Then there was the celebration of feeling strong enough to graduate from using a roller bag to carrying a bag on my back. Those little steps feel huge when dealing with chronic pain.

I'm happy to say that after over a year, I made a physical and emotional comeback. So much of my recovery was due to consistency and the people around me cheering me on — they fought for me, even when I couldn't fight for myself.


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