- My now-husband and I met in college and dated for years before we broke up.
- I went on to marry twice before rekindling with him and deciding to blend our families.
When my new husband tells the story of how our journey began, it sounds made up: He says he saw me across a crowded dorm lobby and all the other students blurred away. He vowed to his buddies that he was not moving until he saw me reemerge from my dorm. Fifteen minutes after first spotting me, he introduced himself.
Even though I was only 17 when we met, I had sworn I had been in love previously, but this was different. It was honest and mature. Soon we became known as the quintessential couple on campus. We were lovers and best friends. We were together for six years before parting ways. I never expected to marry him 27 years later.
I married someone else and divorced after two years
Before I knew it, I was married to someone else by 24, pregnant by 25, and divorced by 26. Save for my precious baby girl, this had been an obvious mistake.
My first husband might have seemed like a catch on paper, but he was sorely lacking in areas that mattered — like friendship and commitment. Now a single mom, I learned to navigate my new reality while figuring out when and how to date again.
During this time, my college sweetheart was entering and exiting new relationships, too. After a few years apart, he called and told me that he understood why I had made the choice to part, and he wanted to be friends. This was music to my ears, as I had missed one of my truest companions. Over the years to come, I would go on to marry — and divorce — again. He would go on to have the son he so desperately wanted.
We would catch up from time to time, and it was wonderful to know that my friend was doing well in life.
We went from being friendly to flirty
In early 2016, after my second marriage ended after I had my son, our friendly check-ins turned a bit more serious. We talked often and enjoyed getting to know each other again. As the conversations grew more serious, we found ourselves falling in love again.
We knew we wanted to be together and we talked about how that would work. With young sons to consider, we made sure that we were moving at the right pace. We decided to introduce the boys at a local arcade, pretending as if we had just run into one another. We were nervous about them meeting, knowing that their approvals were key to whether we moved forward.
We were thoroughly enjoying our new, grown-up relationship. After dating for two years, we found the perfect home and joined our households. Never having lived together before, we were thankful to find that it was not hard because there was a familiarity between us that is uncommon in "new" couples.
In addition, communication is one of our strengths because we give each other the respect of fully listening to each other, and we truly hate to argue.
In April 2021, with the pandemic continuing to limit large gatherings, my boyfriend, a DJ, proposed during one of his radio shows. I happily accepted, live on social media, in front of hundreds of excited friends, and we began to plan a May 2022 wedding.
It was important to us that we plan a ceremony that truly represented this unique union by writing our own vows and having an after-party with 90's hip-hop music. The clouds that were supposed to ruin our day held on and allowed the sun to break through as we took pictures in meaningful spots on the campus where we met.
We were surrounded by family and friends from every stage of our journey and when you see the pictures, the joy is real.