- The coronavirus
lockdown may be taking its toll on yourmental health . - Whether you're feeling isolated, anxious, depressed, or even just a bit lonely, it's likely to feel more overwhelming now than ever before.
- Psychologist and founder of Whole Child Therapy Nerys Hughes told Insider there's a simple way to help ground yourself every day.
- She said you can ask yourself: "How has the day treated me today?"
- It helps you gain perspective to stop spiraling, and also diverts the blame away from yourself.
The coronavirus lockdown could be taking its toll on your mental
Whatever it is that's overwhelming you right now, psychologist and founder of Whole Child Therapy Nerys Hughes has a way to help you ground yourself and stop the negative thought spiral.
She told Insider her friend had given her a piece of advice that really resonated with her — she decided whether or not to have a glass of wine at night based on how the day had treated her.
Rather than telling herself she would only have a glass on certain evenings, the friend would make the decision based on what her immediate feelings about the day were.
A glass of wine could then be poured as a relaxing reward to unwind after everything had gone smoothly, or as a treat to take the edge off if it had been particularly difficult.
"I just thought that line of, 'How has the day treated me today"' before I decide what I'm going to do tomorrow is a really valuable reflection," Hughes said. "How has the day treated me?"
This simple statement helps you think about how you're really doing, but it also diverts the blame away from yourself. Often, when feeling low, we can scold ourselves, either because we don't feel like we deserve to wallow, or because we think we've caused the problem. By asking how the day has treated you, you place that responsibility on something else.
"We've learned that we don't have to put so many demands on ourselves, or that we have put too many demands on ourselves that left us not able to manage this period," Hughes said. "It's much kinder to work out how the day has treated you, and what's going to make you feel a bit better instead of putting demands on yourself."
For some, it might be a glass of wine, for others, it's a Netflix binge or a book. Whatever it is, don't think of it as a guilty pleasure. Think of it as self-care.
"We talk about mindfulness, we talk about gratitude, but actually enacting them and following them through is difficult," Hughes said. "This is a time that I think is going to ask us to reflect on that. Are you able to enact self-care in your life and how well are you doing that?
"It's a question I think a lot of us are going to have to reflect on quite deeply."
This doesn't mean you have to come out of lockdown as a mindfulness guru. In fact, Hughes recommends against it. She said, by all means, look into practicing skills like meditation if you've got the time, but not if you're going to find it difficult.
"That might not be the toolkit for your mental wellbeing right now because you're talking about applying new pressure," she said. "And any good sort of mindfulness practitioner would tell you mindfulness is a preventative tool, not a direct in crisis treatment tool."
If by the end of lockdown you want to be able to do a specific yoga pose for four minutes, and that goal is meaningful for you, go for it, Hughes said.
"But if that ambition is becoming something that then puts extra pressure on you, then remove it," she said. "Give yourself some grace ... How has the day treated me?"
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Read the original article on Insider