- The holiday season can be stressful for families with children on the autism spectrum.
- Both overstimulation and lack of routine might cause children to feel uncomfortable.
With the holiday season right around the corner, families are already beginning to make plans for the most wonderful time of the year. For many families with children on the autism spectrum, the long stretch of celebrating can also be one of the most stressful times of the year.
"The holiday season can be overstimulating for all of us," Amanda Woodman, the clinical director at Springtide Child Development, said. "I can only imagine what it's like for children on the autism spectrum. There's a lot happening both visually and auditory, and it is all packed into this two-month period of time."
Christmas lights, loud music, Santa Claus, bright decorations, and crowds of people can easily overwhelm an autistic child. "We're not going to know exactly how they're feeling inside, but based on their behavior and communication, we can get a feel for understanding if they are comfortable or not," Woodman said.
Another hurdle for families with children on the autism spectrum is the change of routine. Woodman said that autistic kids are used to a routine, and "the holidays are not a time we see the same thing every day — every day is often very different."
Families may do out-of-the-ordinary activities like going to see Santa, watching films, visiting family, or eating special meals.
Here's how can parents support their children with autism amid the sensory overload and change of routine.
Practice for success
If parents are hoping to involve their child in traditions that could be overstimulating, Woodman advised practicing in the places you'd like to take them.
"Visit when it isn't such a busy time," she said. "Go on a different evening or the middle of the day. They will be able to get used to the environment without the extra people. The hope is that they would be successful when it is busier."
When there are special dinners planned around a table, set the table beforehand and run through the routine of the dinner.
"It can help kids feel more comfortable to know they have been through this before," said Woodman. "They know what things look like, what things feel like."
Social narratives
Social stories are written, step-by-step narratives that explain specific situations and solutions for a particular child with that child's perspective in mind.
"For example, if you are going to see Santa, you could provide a story about visiting Santa with that child in the story," explained Woodman. "It will tell them the social norms that will happen during that time, breaking it down into steps for the child with pictures and words."
Picture calendars
With a total change of daily routine, a child on the autism spectrum may find it helpful to have a picture schedule. Woodman suggested printing out a blank calendar and using pictures to designate different activities, like family visits or opening presents, to different days. "For instance, you could print out grandma's picture and put it on the day she is going to arrive," said Woodman.
At the end of the day, parents can review the calendar before going to bed at night as a reminder of what's planned for the next day. With fewer unexpected events, children are more likely to feel more comfortable with what each day brings.
Decorate the house together
When the Christmas decorations come out, children on the spectrum may feel a loss of control and unease with the new appearance of the home.
"Figure out what your child likes," Woodman said. "Maybe they like Christmas lights, but don't like ribbons. Spend time figuring it out so you can cater the decorating of your home and their bedroom to what they are going to be most comfortable with."
Plan how to open gifts
"I think one of hardest things for children on the autism spectrum is opening gifts," Woodman said. "Taking turns to open presents could take hours." To help a child cope during the long waiting periods, Woodman suggested making a plan for the order presents will be opened.
"Maybe let them open a gift first — something they can actually play with until it is their turn to open again," she said. "I've also seen families who have a card they pass around to show when it is your turn to open a gift. It's a visual for the child to see when it's their turn."
Don't make children be affectionate
Children diagnosed with ASD often have sensory issues and may not enjoy obligatory hugs and kisses from family members. "You can talk to people beforehand and just let them know your child might be hesitant," advised Woodman. "You can explain the reason why and then offer other alternatives your child might be comfortable with, like high fives."