- The supermodel Ashley Graham said she exclusively breastfed her oldest child.
- But when she had twins, she realized she couldn't feed them both with just breast milk, she said.
When Ashley Graham gave birth to twin boys, Malachi and Roman, in January, she realized she wasn't going to be able to exclusively breastfeed two babies, she said.
"It was this daunting feeling of: I can't feed my babies," the model said in a video filmed with the formula company Bobbie. "I gave birth to you, but I can't feed you."
Graham exclusively breastfed her son Isaac, born in 2020, for 13 months. But she said that as soon as she saw two babies on an ultrasound screen, she worried about breastfeeding twins.
"I said, 'Mom, how am I going to breastfeed them?'" Graham said. She added that her concerns were confirmed when the boys had trouble latching.
She found a solution that she says not enough people talk about: combo feeding with formula and breast milk. She said she wants other people to understand that combo feeding is a great choice for many families.
"We don't have to do it all," she said. "We don't have to breastfeed. We don't have to pump constantly. We don't have to solely give our babies breast milk. Sure enough, my babies drink breast milk, they drink formula, and everybody's OK." Graham said that while she combo-fed for six months, she ultimately switched to just formula for her boys.
Many babies in America are combo-fed
While social media might have us believe that breastfeeding is all or nothing, research suggests that most babies in America get a combination of breast milk and formula. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has found that about 75% of infants receive some formula by the time they're 6 months old.
"In this 'breast is best' versus 'fed is best' feeding culture we have, parents are told by society that it's one or the other," said Laura Modi, the CEO and cofounder of Bobbie. "No one is addressing the fact that most parents choose both."
Often, how a baby is fed is fluid — pun intended. Graham said she found this to be true; she decided to switch from combo feeding to using solely formula after six months for her boys.
"For many parents, there's often a series of decisions that play out over the course of your feeding experience — and no matter where you are on that journey, there is no wrong choice," Graham said.
Modi said that how parents feed their babies isn't black-and-white. "How you're feeding at month two may not look the same way as feeding on month eight," she said. "Or how you're feeding your first baby may be completely different with your second."
Modi, who has three kids, is also familiar with the choice to incorporate formula. "You walk into parenthood — motherhood, in my case — just assuming you'll breastfeed and it will be this beautiful experience," she said. "But for the majority of us, that's not the reality. It certainly wasn't for me."
Frustrated by her experience and the conversation around infant feeding, Modi started Bobbie.
"I wanted to change the parenting conversation from one of comparison to one of confidence," she said. "When it comes to feeding, whatever is best for you and your family — that is what's best. No matter what your feeding journey looks like, as a parent, you deserve to feel good about it. Full stop."
Breaking down shame over formula feeding
Graham said she had to push aside her hesitations before combo-feeding her boys and ultimately switching to formula fully.
"It took me really getting over the stigma I had put on myself that, you know, breast milk is best," she said.
Though many parents combo-feed, many feel shame about using formula, Modi said. She added that some parents even feel compelled to lie about their infant's receiving formula.
"A majority of formula-feeding parents are combo-feeding, and yet no one's talking about it," she said.