Science- There's no evidence that
oral sex is a primary transmission route for the coronavirus, but that doesn't mean havingsex with a dating app match right now is a good idea. - Being in close contact with any stranger could put you and the people you live with at risk for getting COVID-19.
- If your dating app match is as great as he seems, he'll be willing to wait until this is all over to meet in the flesh. In the meantime, propose phone sex or try to masturbate more often.
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I'm single and have been isolating with my family during the pandemic, but despite their company I still feel lonely. I've also been craving sex and physical touch, so I've been spending my free time on dating apps.
I really hit it off with one particular match, and even though we've never met in person, we both agree the physical chemistry is there. He even suggested meeting up to have sex since we live fairly close, and said oral sex is completely safe and won't spread the virus to our families because we're both symptom-free.
I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought about meeting in person, but I'm still concerned and unsure sex with a relative stranger is a good idea right now. Do his oral-sex claims add up?
- London
Dear London,
Being pent up inside for weeks on end with no one but your close family, even if they're great, is a challenge.
We're all going through it, and the need for a sexual outlet is something on everyone's minds.
So I'll get right to it: There's no research that suggests oral sex, or penetrative sex, for that matter, is a clear transmission route for the coronavirus from person-to-person that doctors are concerned about. But that doesn't mean you should jump at the chance to meet with your new internet lover.
Sex with anyone besides yourself, oral sex included, involves close contact and scientists and doctors know that being near others is an easy way to spread the virus. That's why the CDC recommends keeping at least six feet from people outside of your household for the time being.
Even if you and your online crush are asymptomatic, there's evidence that one of you could be carrying the virus without realizing it. If that's the case, an innocent meetup could put the families that you're currently living with at risk of falling ill.
It's in the best interest of your match, yourself, both of your families, and your immediate community, to put this and any other meetups on hold for the time being.
I know it's not the answer you wanted to hear, but there are ways to get a bit of sexual satisfaction without risking the
If you're comfortable doing so, you could propose video or phone sex with him. And if he's not interested, you've got self-pleasure on your side.
Although this time means putting your sex life as you knew it on hold, there are new ways to explore and satisfy that side of yourself. Lean on those in the meantime, and if your dating app match is as great as he seems, he'll be willing to wait until this is all over to meet in the flesh.
As Insider's resident sex and relationships reporter, Julia Naftulin is here to answer all of your questions about dating, love, and doing it — no question is too weird or taboo. Julia regularly consults a panel of health experts including relationship therapists, gynecologists, and urologists to get science-backed answers to your burning questions, with a personal twist.
Have a question? Fill out this anonymous form. All questions will be published anonymously.
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