My boyfriend broke up with me 12 hours before I moved cities for him. I was able to have the life I wanted all along.

• I quit my job, moved out of my apartment, and was ready to move in with my boyfriend.
• But 12 hours before I was set to drive over to start our life together, he broke up with me.

"I don't think this is going to work," he said.

I was 12 hours from getting in my packed car and driving toward him to start our lives as a couple in the same city. A job, a lease, and a loving relationship were waiting there for me — or so I thought.

After our breakup was final, I knew I had to make a decision quickly. It had taken time to dismantle the life I had in my own city, seven hours away from him. I'd left a house and roommates I loved, quit my job, and moved in with my parents for a couple of weeks before my new life was set to start.

I'd spent months looking at places on my visits to see him, interviewing for jobs, and dreaming about dates that didn't require so much prior planning.

But the city didn't call to me. It was him I wanted. If he didn't want me anymore, there was no reason to go. It took two texts and a phone call to cancel everything. For the first time in my adult life, I felt completely adrift.

I was left with nothing

Most breakups leave a broken heart, but not all of them leave you without a place to live or a way to make a living, on top of the emotional turmoil.

My parents were blessedly willing to let me stay while I got back on my feet. I started to wonder, "Now that I don't have a day job, maybe it's time to make my dream of writing full time a reality." I'd been freelancing in the nooks and crannies of my other paid work for years, but I'd been afraid to take the leap to call it my career. I began sending out pitches, knowing that if I didn't do it now, I never would.

It took a few months before I was making as much as I had been at my traditional job. The work wasn't easy, but it was fast-paced and filled with variety, which let me explore my interests. I loved every moment.

I built the life I wanted

I moved out of my parents' house, applied for graduate school, and bought a house, all in the city I hadn't really wanted to leave to begin with.

Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we hadn't broken up that day. I would have gotten in my car and moved to another state. My gut tells me that our breakup would have happened either way, but it might have made it harder to choose the life I have now.

Instead, my husband, daughter, and I now live in the house I bought. My flexible schedule allows me to be the mom I hoped to be when I was pregnant. My work still makes me smile when I get out of bed in the morning, ready to greet the day.

I thought that long-ago love was the best one I'd ever have, but I was wrong. The loss of that love made a way for so many better ones — my family, of course — but also my career. Having lost so much, I had nothing to lose. I jumped, and in the process, I gained everything I'd ever wanted.