I'm a former college teacher. Here's what you should never say to your professors.

• I taught writing at a university for nine years.
• You should never ask a professor if they accept late work.

I had the privilege of teaching college writing classes for nine years. It was hard work; I'd have to grade an ever growing stack of research essays in the evenings, on weekends, and even on holidays. Teaching — no matter the level — can be an arduous task.

I found most interactions with my students enjoyable and productive. I was able to provide resources, letters of recommendation, and even advice for their roommate woes.

However, students said some wild, hilarious, and ridiculous things to me. Sometimes they should have kept those statements to themselves. Here's what you should avoid saying to your college professors if you don't want to tick them off.

'This class is easy, and I don't need it'

There was always at least one student per semester who sauntered up to me the first week and let me know that they shouldn't be in my class. Basically, they were too smart and had already learned all I had to teach them.

Ironically, they didn't test out of my class, and they didn't already know it all. They came across as egotistical. Sorry, Student, but you actually do need this class. It's a graduation requirement.

'My high-school teacher said …'

I hope each student had a solid high-school education to prepare them for university learning. But adding contradictory information you learned from a past teacher isn't helpful during my lesson.

Students need to be open to new experiences, material, and ideas.

'I didn't come to class because …'

I've heard some outright ridiculous reasons a student missed a class or several classes.

One student told me they couldn't come to class because their pet lizard's tail fell off. That's not a reason to blow off class. Neither is sleeping in, having an argument with your romantic partner, or scheduling an appointment during class time.

But of course, don't come to class sick, and feel free to attend the funeral or family wedding.

'Did I miss anything?'

One of the worst questions a student can ask a teacher is whether anything happened while they were absent.

This became so common that I'd sarcastically retort: "No, we didn't do anything while you were gone. We can now resume class because you are here today."

Please communicate with your teacher if you must be absent. Otherwise, show up to class and be ready to learn.

'Do you accept late work?'

A teacher's policies are clearly outlined in the syllabus, which is made available to all students on the first day of class. Do not ask your teacher on the day the project or paper is due whether they take late work. Read the syllabus.

If an emergency pops up, immediately contact the teacher and respectfully ask for an extension. But also know that your pet lizard's tail falling off isn't an emergency.

'You're unfair'

One of the worst accusations a teacher can face from a student who isn't getting their way is that the teacher is unfair.

As a college teacher, I worked hard to create equitable policies and implement them across the board. An entitled student's poor planning or lack of readiness isn't usually the teacher's fault. We have many students, and we can't keep making exceptions for a select few, because that would be truly unfair.

The most successful college students are respectful, organized, hardworking, present, and honest. They ask for help when they need it — and we are very willing to help. They don't make excuses or try to blame the teacher for their own mistakes.

College certainly isn't easy, but students can make it easier on themselves by avoiding these comments and questions professors hate.