I'm 34 and my best friend is 62. Our friendship is like a mother-daughter relationship.

• Vanessa Gordon is a 34-year-old publisher of a sustainable travel and food publication.
• Five years ago, she struck up a friendship with a 62-year-old woman who has become like a mother.

This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Vanessa Gordon. It has been edited for length and clarity.

It had been only two months since meeting Babs that I invited her to travel to Ireland with me. We immediately clicked, often talking about our mutual love of travel.

I'd been looking for someone to travel with consistently — someone who was easygoing, personable, and a planner. Even though I had plenty of friends I could have invited, I knew from experience that just because someone is a good friend, it doesn't mean they will be a good travel partner.

After telling Babs about my travel plans, she mentioned she would love to come to Ireland with me. She said she would pay for her own airfare and totally fund her share of the trip. I said yes, and am so glad I did. We played golf, visited some of her family, met new people, visited famous horse stables, and toured beautiful gardens.

We've traveled a lot together

Following that trip five years ago, we would go on to travel to Mexico, Tennessee, and Greece. We're hoping to visit either Italy or Spain next. She's my go-to travel friend.

What I love most about traveling with Babs is her ability to strike up a conversation and befriend anyone she comes into contact with. She exudes confidence, both when we travel together and when we are back at home, which I'm now learning to have.

It's a confidence I think she has gained with age. Unlike my younger friends, Babs is in touch with who she is. She knows herself, likes herself, and doesn't try to play a "part" for anyone. She doesn't feel the need to prove herself to anyone.

Her confidence is starting to rub off on me. There was a time we went clubbing together, a scene I wasn't used to as I got married and had children very young. But she pushed me out of my comfort zone, and I felt liberated as I danced with her. She didn't care what she looked like, so why should I?

She just wants to have a good time

At 62, Babs just wants to have a good time rather than getting caught up in all the drama of youth. As much as I love all of my younger friends, they come with a lot of emotion. Babs doesn't concern herself with it — she knows life is short and just wants to enjoy all the years she has left.

When we aren't traveling, we are doing memory-making, fun things together. Twice a month, we meet up and watch a football game, go to a concert, golf, or just go out for food. We always have such a good time.

In addition to having fun, we also talk endlessly about life. I know I can trust Babs not to gossip to others about anything I've said. I find that people who gossip are after self-validation. Babs doesn't need it.

She's like a mother to me

The friendship is particularly meaningful as I don't have much of a connection with most of my extended family. Babs has become a pseudo-mother to me. And as she doesn't have any children of her own, I think I have become like a daughter to her. We often get mistaken as mother and daughter when we are out, even though we look nothing alike.

She has taught me so many lessons about life. Be a leader, not a follower. Careful of what you say because it'll stick. Always put your best foot forward. Just relax. They are all phrases she has both said to me and lived out in her own life.

Most importantly, she has taught me to stand my own ground. In our conversations, she will vocally disagree with me. I'm now learning to do the same with both her and other people.

Younger friends of mine have often criticized me for my friendship with Babs. "Why are you hanging out with someone that age?" they ask. "You have nothing in common. She doesn't know you and doesn't know our generation."

I politely tell them I disagree and that our different generations understand each other more than we think. It's very narrow-minded that they would think otherwise.

If anything, I enjoy being with Babs more than many of my younger friends. When I'm 62, I'd hope to be just like her.