Double-texting your crush isn't always a bad idea. Here's how to decide whether to hit send, according to a therapist.

• Double-texting, or messaging two times before someone responds, is viewed as taboo in modern dating.
• While double-texting can feel bad, therapists say there is no rule for how much you should text.
• If you feel bad about double-texting, put your phone down and let the other person reply at their own pace.

For many people, the first few weeks of texting a new crush can be nerve-wracking, in part because of how stigmatized messaging more than once has become.

Double-texting, or messaging someone two times or more consecutively, is hotly debated in the world of modern dating. The question of how many messages are too many in a row is crucial to some anxious daters because they want to avoid seeming desperate or annoying.

According to Jennifer Mann, a psychotherapist and media advisor for the Hope for Depression Research Foundation, there is no hard and fast rule with double-texting, despite its negative reputation.

"As with anything in relationships or building communication with another person, there really should not be any over-generalized right or wrong rules made," Mann told Insider. "When it comes to if it's OK to double text your crush, I would say, depending on the context and content, yes it is OK!"

When is it OK to double text?

Even if you feel comfortable double-texting sometimes, it can be hard to gauge when sending multiple messages is appropriate.

A 2017 survey by dating app Hinge found timing matters when it comes to double messaging. The optimal amount of time before sending a second message was four hours according to data surveyed from over 300,000 US conversations on the app.

But according to Mann, it isn't about waiting a specific amount of time. How you communicate with your crush, or anyone for that matter, should be an organic process developed together.

In addition to understanding what kind of texting is appropriate to your crush, you should also check in with yourself about when double-texting starts to make you feel bad.

"Double texting can be bad for self-worth if the content of the messages works to degrade you or comes from a place of desperation and fear," Mann told Insider.

While double-texting is common with crushes, the same rule can apply to friends, family members, and coworkers you're feeling stress about not hearing back from.

If you start feeling bad, it's best to put down your phone and let the other person reply at their own pace

According to Mann, double-texting is not inherently negative or bad for your self-esteem. However, it's important to look out for obsessive thoughts about double-texting.

If you find yourself compulsively checking your messages every few minutes or seconds, feeling anxiety about not getting a response quickly, or feel overburdened by the conversations themselves, it might be time to put the phone down.

"A double text can become 'too intense' when it is driven from a place of fear or may degrade your self-worth," Mann told Insider.

"Checking in with yourself, tuning in, and understanding the reason behind what you are trying to accomplish can be a helpful way of judging whether you want to continue to put yourself 'out there' over text."