Do you need 6 besties? A popular TikTok advice columnist says you can use different types of friends to be fulfilled

• The "6 besties" theory was coined by advice columnist and social media influencer Alexandra Hayes Robinson.
• She said your closest friends should fill 6 different roles in your life.

As you grow older, the role of a best friend can get muddled. Someone who wore a matching bracelet with you in middle school is now someone you talk to once every three months in adulthood. In the meantime, you may have gotten a matching tattoo with your work wife and grown really close to that new friend in your pottery class, all while wondering who your true BFF is.

The good news, according to TikToker Alexandra Hayes Robinson, is that you don't have to have just one "best friend."

In fact, she argues in her viral "6 besties" theory video, "you need different friends for different purposes," from always being there in cases of emergencies (what she terms the "dead body bestie") to being a guaranteed-fun hang (the "good time bestie").

According to Robinson, who said in a video that she based this theory on her own experiences, this mindset can help you feel happier by knowing which friend to go to depending on your needs. A friend who's fun to go to a Taylor Swift concert with might not be the one you call during a work crisis, and that's ok. Robinson did not respond to Insider's request for comment.

"The idea of the categories is appealing because it fosters the thinking of no one person has to be all things," Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore, a psychologist and author of friendship books like "Growing Feelings," told Insider. "There are lots of different kinds of friends and they can all have value."

Kennedy-Moore believes that diversifying friendships — and appreciating varying types of friends — can lead to healthier bonds.

The six types of besties

Robinson's "six besties theory" has clearly resonated — her videos on the topic have garnered over 10 million TikTok views, with many people expressing that she's changed how they view their friendships. Here are the six types of best friends Robinson thinks everyone should have:

• The "Dead body bestie": A friend you call when you've really messed up. They won't judge you — they'll just help you.
• The "Good time bestie": A friend you go to for a really fun time out.
• The "Work bestie": A friend you connect with at work.
• The "Seasonal bestie": A friend who is in a similar life season to you — like someone who also just became a new mom, or is training for a marathon at the same time as you are.
• The "OG bestie": A childhood friend who's known you for a long time and knows your past very well.
• The "North Star bestie": A friend who you feel soulfully connected to and fully understood by.

Looking for one bestie to fulfill all your needs brews disappointment

Kennedy-Moore said that having a "soulmate or nothing" attitude when it comes to best friends can result in extreme dissatisfaction. As with romantic relationships, no one person can fulfill all your needs or share all your interests.

She believes a better approach to friendships is branching out. "Maybe this is the friend that you watch the one TV series together, " she said. "Maybe this is the friend that you only see when you get together with that group, and that's fine. Any of those can enrich our lives."

But categorizing friends can also get restrictive

While Robinson's friendship categories can be a fun way to tag friends on TikTok, Kennedy-Moore said you don't need to stick to these specific ones — or any at all.

"Friendships have so many flavors because they're unique to the two people involved," she said.

For example, one of Robinson's six types of besties is the "OG bestie": Someone who's known you since you were very young. If you moved around a lot as a kid, however, you might not have an "OG bestie" from home and that's ok.

Plus, "Friendships also evolve as we move through different stages in our lives," Kennedy-Moore said. Your office buddy could become a roommate, bringing you closer. Or, a best friend from college might live far away, altering your relationship dynamic a little.

The important thing is to stay open to change — and find new friends if you start to feel gaps in your life.

The answer to loneliness isn't more friends, but deeper friendships

While many commenters happily relate to Robinson's theory, others feel saddened that they don't have six besties.

"I find myself worried about not having an 'OG bestie.' Is it too late in life for me to find/make one?" reads one comment. "Time to get six friends," said another.

Kennedy-Moore explained that when people want to feel less lonely, the answer tends to be less about racking up acquaintances and more about finding people who really click with them. If you want deeper friendships, she said, a good place to start is by looking for someone in your life you'd like to get to know better.

"And then put in the time, because friendships take time and also take a willingness to put ourselves out there," she said.

If you don't have anyone in mind, she suggested finding an activity you love doing that you could do with other people, like a creative hobby or sports team.