Agender is not the same as nonbinary. Here's what it means to have no gender, and how it plays a role in the finale of 'And Just Like That.'
- Warning: Spoilers ahead for "And Just Like That" episode 10.
- Rock Goldenblatt told their parents they don't want to be labeled as anything, including nonbinary.
- There are plenty of agender people who, like Rock, aren't any gender.
Rock Goldenblatt's storyline on "And Just Like That" has been about them finding the language to describe their gender. But in the "Sex and the City" revival's season finale, they asked to be labeled as nothing at all.
The 10th episode of the season takes place in the middle of Rock's "they-mitzvah," a gender neutral Jewish celebration in place of a bar mitzvah or bat mitzvah, for their 13th birthday.
Though their parents Charlotte York-Goldenblatt and Harry Goldenblatt threw the celebration in an attempt to honor Rock's gender journey, Rock says they really just want the freedom to figure out their gender themselves — without rigid labels.
"I don't want to be labeled as anything. Not as a girl, or boy, nonbinary, a Jew, Christian, Muslim, not even as a New Yorker," Rock tells their parents after refusing to participate in the ceremony. "I'm only 13, can't I just be me?"
Rock is still figuring out their gender. However, there are plenty of people who never fall into any gender categories.
Being agender generally means being genderless or having no gender
Though agender often falls under the nonbinary umbrella — or spectrum of people who are not men or women — the term refers to people who are entirely outside of the realm of any gender.
According to Dr. Meredith Chapman, a psychiatrist at the Children's Health Genecis Program, being agender generally means the absence of gender. Unlike nonbinary people, who often are one or more genders, agender people have no gender at all.
Being agender doesn't automatically mean gender neutral or that a person uses they/them pronouns, so it's important to always ask what pronouns people use and not assume. Just like people of any gender, agender folks may use he, she, they, or neopronouns like ze/xir. Some people may not use pronouns at all.
It's also important to note not all agender people experience their identity in the same way, so the term can mean different things to different people.