After blacking out and waking up on a plane in the Dallas airport, I knew I needed help getting sober
- When I woke up hungover on a plane in Texas with no memory of getting there, I knew I needed help.
- As a drug addict, alcoholic, and thief, finding a recovery program set me on a 36-year journey.
It was the Monday after the New York Giants had defeated the Denver Broncos in Super Bowl XXI. Even though it was midday, I was just waking up. That's no surprise, as I vaguely remembered a wild Super Bowl party at my house.
My pounding head indicated it had indeed been one hell of a night. Before I opened my eyes, I heard over a loudspeaker, "We'll be landing at Dallas-Fort Worth airport." If that wasn't startling enough, I quickly opened my eyes to discover I was in the center seat of a plane.
I reached into my pocket to find a considerable amount of cash. How did it get there? More importantly, how did I get there? I sunk deeper into my seat, trying to remember what had happened.
It all started to come back to me. Not just how I got on the plane in yet another blackout but how I ended up here, at the lowest point of my life. It was a life full of new lows.
The worst day of my life was also my wake-up call
I was a 28-year-old drug addict, alcoholic, and thief. The money in my pocket was the only thing left from my family's marine supply business I had bankrupted with a daily cocaine habit. It's an easy habit when your best customers are smugglers.
It was easily the worst day of my life, but I would discover it was a life-changing day — the first of many. But before I could appreciate its impact, I had to return home to face the consequences of my actions.
When I returned from my blackout plane ride, I discovered that my father, my business partner, had figured out I had been stealing from our business. I didn't think I could feel lower than I had on the plane, but meeting with him was terrible.
My father knew I was a drinker, but he had no idea my cocaine habit was so bad. (My drug dealers sure did.) I told him I would stop drinking and using drugs on my own, but he insisted I see a therapist he knew.
An eccentric therapist led me to a recovery program
I met with the therapist, who seemed like a nice enough guy. Then it got, well, weird. He told me that he had a theory that alcoholics and drug addicts are reincarnated warriors from the past, and he could hypnotize me and speak to the warrior. I blurted out, "Oh, hell no!" And as a side note, I would have been a terrible warrior.
But he did one thing that saved my life. He told me to go to a recovery program. There, I learned the power of growth and change one day at a time. The experience set me on a 36-year journey of recovery, redemption, and more success than I could have imagined.
Getting sober meant focusing on one small success each day
Not drinking and using drugs was extremely hard. I had been using them since I was 12 years old. What can I say? I was an early adopter.
As much as I wanted to fix and change everything at once, I learned I couldn't. I first had to learn to live a new way of life. That new life started with me getting through a day without a drink or a drug. That was early success for me.
Honestly, I didn't believe I could do it. But I was desperate. So, I moved forward with equal parts fear and determination. I trusted the people around me. They were happy, and I wasn't. They were successful. I was a failure. I wanted and needed a better life.
Each day I set out to have "One-Day Success," like those I was leaning on told me I could.
Then something happened. My life got better. I got better. Day after day, I cleared the wreckage of my past. I repaired relationships. I gave up my business. I got a new job I didn't want but desperately needed. All those hard, trying, successful days brought about incredible change and growth.
The day made my year and has made my life. My work and life were transformed by what I came to see as One-Day Success.
Through my growth, I developed my "One-Day Success" mindset
My career took off. I quickly got three promotions. I moved from Florida to Boston, where I only knew one person.
I went from being broke and unemployed to running a flagship store for a top specialty retailer. All in a day. Not all in one day. A day. Day after day after day.
As I evolved, so did my One-Day Success. I still needed to live a day without a drink or a drug, but I also measured success in how I was developing and growing.
One-Day Success was learning how to correctly manage a business and people. It was taking responsibility for everything in my life and learning to lead a team and grow a division. I tried to give my employees a great work experience.
I then experienced a level of success that I never dreamed possible. I raised a family. I got incredible opportunities with The Sharper Image and Bose Corporation. I ran a 1,200-person organization. I was CEO of a national title company that I led through massive growth. My leadership style and approach to growing businesses were always the same. I focused on achieving One-Day Success, day after day after day.
I still make mistakes, but now I learn from them and move on
It's not to say I didn't make mistakes. I've made plenty. What's different, though, is that I was able to learn from them and just as quickly leave them. I was determined to do better and be better the next day.
Today I advise companies large and small. I coach executives and business owners. I've traveled the world speaking and consulting. Everything I do is grounded in helping people achieve long-term success by maximizing single-day performance, thus creating One-Day Success.
Excerpted from "The Day Makes the Year (Makes a Life): Transform your work and life with One-Day Success" (Five Leaf Clover Publishing, August 21, 2023). Reprinted with permission from Five Leaf Clover Publishing.