5 tips to be more empathetic in your relationships and daily life

• To be more empathetic, you should actively listen to other people and learn how to understand non-verbal communication.
• You can also read fiction novels and watch movies to practice empathy, as it can help you relate to someone else's emotions and experiences.
• Empathy may improve relationships and reduce aggression because empathetic people are less judgmental and work to understand others.

When it comes to improving your well-being, having healthy amounts of empathy can help improve relationships and your overall connection to the society you live in.

Here's why empathy is important and five ways to be more empathetic in your daily life.

What is empathy?

"Empathy is actually walking in the shoes of the other person, and being able to recognize the emotion that the other person is having," says Ranga Krishnan, MD, the CEO of the Rush University System for Health and advocate of increasing empathy in healthcare.

There are two types of empathy:

• Affective empathy involves your response to another person's emotions, such as you getting anxious when another person is nervous.
• Cognitive empathy means you can put yourself in the perspective of another person and relate to their emotions. For example, you might understand that your friend doesn't like dogs because of a traumatic experience, and try to avoid those situations with them.

Different settings require different types of empathy. For example, if you're trying to console a friend who's had a rough day, showing affective empathy can help your friend feel valid in their emotions. Cognitive empathy can help you relate to other's emotions and build a deeper, more intimate relationship with them.

A 2016 study explained that humans are empathetic because it's a "prosocial" trait - it makes us sensitive to distress and drives us to improve the lives of others.

How to be more empathetic

Being empathetic can show your loved ones that you care and improve your own well-being. If you're looking to have more empathy, try the following:

1. Read fiction. A small 2014 study found that those who read fiction show higher levels of cognitive empathy since readers are "transported" into the perspective of characters. This may help you learn how to relate with others in the real world.

2. Watch movies. If you don't have time to read a book, Krishnan recommends watching movies and trying to relate with characters. "Very few people can watch a really sad movie and not feel bad," he says. Practicing this emotion by yourself may also translate to more empathetic interactions with others.

3. Listen to other perspectives. Highly empathetic people tend to be curious about other people's experiences. They listen to what the other person is saying and try to understand where they are coming from. Empathetic listening is different from just hearing someone, as you must actively work to relate to what they are saying and grasp their viewpoints to understand their perspective.

4. Learn to read non-verbal communication. Empathy also goes beyond listening. You might have to look at people's body language or facial expressions to surmise how they are actually feeling. For example, let's say someone is trembling and looks visibly nervous before getting a shot at the doctor's office. A nurse can empathize with having a fear of needles but wanting to show a brave face, and thus the nurse can soften their tone when speaking to the patient to make them feel better. Some medical professionals are even put in programs to sharpen non-verbal cue reading skills, Krishnan says.

5. Protect against compassion fatigue. Krishnan explains that unless you have conditions like alexithymia, in which it is difficult to express or feel emotions, you should protect your empathy from getting desensitized, part of a condition called compassion fatigue. Some people can't avoid situations in which they need to empathize with others, such as medical professionals or social workers, and it's important to actively practice empathy to avoid becoming jaded or cynical.

Why empathy is important for your health

Being empathetic means that you're less likely to judge someone because you understand that they're acting from their own set of circumstances. Being less judgmental due to increased empathy may help reduce aggression and even improve your relationships.

Empathy can also have health benefits for your loved ones. A 2016 study found that adolescents with empathetic parents had better emotional regulation and less inflammation in their bodies. Empathetic parents were also able to better regulate their emotions and feel greater self-esteem and purpose in life.

However, empathy may have some downsides. The same study found that empathetic parents show greater levels of systemic inflammation. And too much empathy could actually contribute to feelings of sadness, according to a 2007 paper. That's because highly empathetic people can often take on the pain of others in stressful situations, increasing their own feelings of distress.

In general, though, Krishnan says that empathy leads to a better life. "It's hard to actually pull it apart and say it's empathy that leads to happiness, but happiness and empathy are correlated," he says.

Insider's takeaway

Overall, Krishnan says that being empathetic is associated with better happiness and mental health, which can improve how you treat yourself and others. To be more empathetic, try listening to others verbal and non-verbal cues, read fiction novels, or watch movies to put yourself in someone else's shoes.

"We know from a fair amount of research that humans are built to understand each other and feel for each other," Krishnan says. "To understand that you need empathy is critical for social organisms, such as humans, to be able to function."

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