5 easy mindfulness exercises to do at your desk to help regulate your emotions, according to a psychologist

• Emotional dysregulation is when you feel swept away by your emotional reactions.
• A psychologist recommended a few simple exercises to try when you feel dysregulated.

Everyone experiences intense emotional reactions from time to time. But if you find yourself feeling swept away by emotions to the point where it's impacting your relationships and quality of life, you may be struggling with emotional dysregulation.

Emotional dysregulation isn't just being hot-headed. Common in people with ADHD, autism, and borderline personality disorder, it'salso linked to other symptoms like rejection sensitivity and impulsive behavior.

But by learning to regulate your emotions, you can feel calmer around people and more grounded in your decisions,a therapist told Insider.

Dr. Lara Honos-Webb, a clinical psychologist, previously told Insider that cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), emotion-focused therapy (EFT), and exercise can all help with emotional dysregulation symptoms.

But sometimes, a strong emotion hits us before we have time for an outdoor run or therapy session. That's where some simple thought exercises can come into play, and they're easy enough to do wherever you are.

Honos-Webb shared five quick, easy ways to self-regulate when it feels like your emotions are spiraling out of control.

1. Picture yourself in the future

Honos-Webb said that all these exercises promote "flexible thinking," or encouraging yourself to see things in a new light.

For example, in the thick of intense feelings, it's difficult to remember that a hard moment isn't forever, but just a blip in your life. This exercise can help you remember that.

"Imagine yourself in the future five, 10, or 20 years from now," Honos-Webb said. "What would that self say to you now about your current situation and emotional reaction?"

For example, if you're overwhelmed at work and tempted to yell at your boss, do you think future-you will see it as sticking up for yourself? Or will you likely see it as an overreaction that puts your job at risk?

2. Imagine a loved one's reaction

To help you step outside of yourself more, Honos-Webb suggested imagining the perspective of someone in your life who truly cares about you, such as a family member, close friend, or partner.

If they saw you abruptly exit a group chat because no one responded to your text about hanging out, would this person agree with you? Or would they ask more questions and encourage you to not assume the worst?

3. Give yourself a set time to feel everything

Sometimes, there's just no getting around it: you feel devastated, and need to let it out.

To keep big feelings from taking over your entire day, Honos-Webb recommended grabbing a journal and setting a timer for 15 minutes. "Give yourself permission to write everything you feel and then commit to only diving into that emotion for 15 minutes," she said.

If you need to revisit that same feeling, you can do it for 15 minutes the next day. It helps you notice the feeling, but practice setting boundaries around how often you let it consume you.

4. Change the negativity channel

Honos-Webb said that emotional dysregulation often leads to "discounting the positives." Instead, you only focus on the things that are going wrong.

In an exercise she calls "changing the channel," you can try to acknowledge that you feel bad while also pushing yourself to look for alternate, positive perspectives.

For example, let's say you were rejected from your top-choice of graduate school programs. Once you've processed the disappointment of being rejected, you can move on to different ways of looking at it. Maybe it would've been too expensive anyway, or maybe you were unsure about that life path and now you get to explore another one.

Honos-Webb said this practice aids in "shifting emotional focus after processing distressing feelings," so that you can find solutions instead of remaining stuck.

5. Engage in mindfulness

Honos-Webb said that mindfulness, which "involves self-observation and self-compassion," is a key practice for emotional regulation. Regularly meditating, even for short bursts of time, can teach you to accept your feelings as they come up, which reduces self-blaming and the intensity of your emotional pain.

To practice this, try meditating once a day for just five minutes. After a week, lengthen it to 10 minutes, then 15 minutes. If you need help, there are many free meditation apps that can walk you through guided meditations, or you can even ask ChatGPT to write a meditation schedule for you.