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My office romance turned into a marriage - here are 14 rules for dating a coworker

Aug 24, 2016, 00:18 IST

Laura Leslie Photography
Laura Leslie PhotographyMy husband, Tyler, and me on our wedding day.

Despite all the warnings, I once dated a coworker.

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Here's the thing: We didn't meet on the job.

Tyler and I had been dating for almost four years before we started working together (which, by the way, wasn't planned … long story). But for about 11 months, we sat three cubes apart from one another and kept our relationship under wraps.

That's right. Nobody knew we were a couple.

"Nobody knew?!" "Wasn't it hard to hide?" "Isn't that illegal?"

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Those are questions we're frequently asked when we tell people the story of our office romance.

Our answer to all three: Nope - because we followed the rules.

The truth is, office romances can be very tricky and generally not recommended. But they happen all the time, and when they do, there are three possible outcomes: The relationship turns sour and your reputation and career take a beating; it ends, but you're both mature and cordial and don't let the breakup affect your work; or things work out.

A CareerBuilder survey from February revealed that nearly 40% of employees admitted to having a romantic relationship with a coworker, and one-third of office relationships result in marriage. (Remember that coworker I dated? We got married in October.)

It's up to you to figure out whether pursuing an office relationship is worth the possible consequences, good and bad. If you decide it is, there are a few "rules" you'll want to follow to ensure things don't go awry:

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