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7 signs you should marry your current partner
1. You feel most like yourself when you’re with them
2. They pay attention to the small things
Another sign that you should marry your partner is that they not only pay attention to the big things that happen in your life, but they also celebrate the small things, too. “When your partner takes a genuine interest and authentic concern about the small things in your existence — from a troubling phone call with a family member to an irritating day at work — it’s another sign,” Sumber said.
“The level of connection and healthy, safe attachment in a relationship can often be most evident in these seemingly minor issues, because our partner sits next to us and not above us,” he said.
3. You have kindness and mutual respect for each other
You’ve probably heard the phrase, “treat others how you want to be treated,” and that’s true when it comes to you and your partner, too.
“When kindness is a shared primary value, it can mean great things for a relationship,” Sumber said. “When both partners lead with just being nice and respectful to one another, there is a good chance that you have stumbled onto a gem of a person, and they might inspire you to be even more gem-like, too.”
4. You have a healthy give-and-take
In addition to having good communication, being able to compromise is a key factor in maintaining a healthy relationship. “Great couples know that both partners need to give and take,” Elmquist said. “This reciprocity allows for balance in a relationship over the long term.”
5. You’re comfortable together — no matter what
Isn’t it the best when you can be yourself around someone no matter what? Elmquist agrees that this is a positive sign when it comes to determining if the person you’re with is marriage material.
“Time flies by with this partner, whether you are active — you can chat for hours with lots of interest in each other’s worlds — or sitting in silence,” she said. “You can do anything together and it feels like home.”
6. Your conflicts are productive
You probably know the difference between healthy arguments and not-so-healthy ones, and if you and your partner have an occasional healthy fights, it’s a good, marriage-minded sign.
“Communication is vital, and it needs to be there in the beginning,” Elmquist said. “When your conflicts are productive, this is a good sign. Knowing that the two of you can manage conflict and upsetting emotions together is critical. This increases your chance of success significantly.”
Similarly, Elmquist added that a willingness to get support and ask for help is crucial, too. “If your partner is open and interested in doing pre-commitment coaching or therapy, this is a great sign that they will continue to pursue support for your relationship down the road,” she said.
7. You have shared life goals
If you and your partner have shared life goals, it’s another sign that you two should tie the knot if and when you feel ready. “You have talked about what you want out of life and what values motivate you,” Elmquist said. “You realize that you are aligned and want to head in the same direction.”
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