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My twin boys are in different classes, and planning their birthdays overwhelmed me. Here's how I celebrated them individually.

Jan 8, 2024, 22:49 IST
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The author and her twin boys.Courtesy of Kat Storr
  • My twins were excited about their birthday but planning two parties felt overwhelming.
  • I also worried about too many presents spoiling them during a tough economic time.
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If your children are anything like mine, they will have planned their next birthday party mere moments after their previous birthday party finishes. And being 4-year-old twins with no concept of money, time, or what's possible in the real world, those plans become more elaborate as time goes on.

I'm not complaining. It's lovely to see their excitement about getting older — we all know that disappears once you hit adulthood. But it can be stressful when their expectations are so high and you don't want to let them down.

Having a party with 60 kids felt like too much

This is doubly awkward when you have twin boys who like completely different things — "Frozen" versus "Lego Ninjago" — and are in separate classes. They will turn 5 in January and there is no way we could get away with a small family party this year.

They've both already attended a few whole-class parties each and have made it obvious that they expect the same. But with 30 children in each of their classes, does that mean we have to host a party with 60 kids?! It would feel cruel to make them invite 10 to 15 children from each class when they're still getting to know everyone.I feel like this quandary is something specific to parents of multiples. How on earth do you find a space that takes 60 rampaging children and their parents, too, because many won't want to be left alone? And are there any party games for that number of children that will be fun and not total chaos? Sleeping lions, perhaps!

Obviously, outsourcing is the key to most successful kids' birthday parties. I'm happy to pay a professional to entertain and exhaust the children, but who knows if a magic show or an Elsa impersonator would cut it with this many little ones.

The idea of them receiving a ton of gifts felt like too much

There are so many things to think about, including the issue of gifts.

We're living through difficult economic times and the thought of the boys receiving piles of gifts feels gross to me. They're very lucky, there really isn't anything that they need right now, and we don't have space in our home for more stuff.

But for some reason, the trend for cutting down on materialistic items doesn't seem to extend to kids' birthday-party gifts. We'd be more than happy to tell the other parents not to buy the boys anything — or to perhaps club together to get them something like a scooter, but this just doesn't seem to be the "done thing" yet. Plus, the parents are still getting to know each other, too — it's only been two months.

Having the same party twice felt like a good compromise

Every child deserves to be spoiled on their birthday. Our older son has had birthday parties each year and we always try to give the twins the same treats and opportunities. Therefore, we think we've settled on a plan that'll work well for everyone. We're going to do the same party, twice, back-to-back in one day. We'll do one of the boy's classes first, followed by pretty much the exact same party for his brother. We've chosen a sports hall, with a bouncy castle and soft-play equipment.

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The author and her family.Courtesy of Kat Storr

This plan means they'll each get to play with their own friends, blow out the candles on their own cake, and be celebrated as individuals. Yes, there may still be up to 60 kids coming in total, but it feels more manageable now that they won't be there all at once. And this is a one-time-only event; it's not happening again. Well, at least not until they're 18, anyway!

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