- Everyone has a natural stress response: fight, flight, freeze, or fawn
- Exposure to trauma can cause these responses to appear when they're not necessary.
Despite our best efforts to control our bodies, sometimes our natural instincts take over.
For example, when you face a threat like a near car crash, your sympathetic nervous system takes control: Your heart rate goes up, you start to sweat, and your pupils dilate.
You can't control these reactions because they are your body's instinct to survive under stress.
"Human beings are biologically wired for survival," says Dr. Ken Duckworth, a psychiatrist and chief medical officer of the National Alliance on Mental Illness. "In the face of a real or perceived threat to our lives, natural defense mechanisms kick in and focus the body and brain acutely and exclusively on dealing with that threat."
While we all have that survival instinct, we react to them in different ways.
For example, if your response to that near car accident is to repeatedly honk your horn and yell at the other driver, then your stress response in that situation is "fight."
There are four stress responses: fight, flight, freeze, and fawn, says Dr. David Helfand, a psychologist at LifeWise Therapy.
In some cases, these responses can be useful, or even life saving. But in other cases, our brains rely too much on these stress responses, in a way that can be impairing.
For example, chronic stress or trauma can rewire the brain to believe that threats are constantly present — a common symptom of many mental health conditions, like PTSD.
"Our nervous systems tend to focus on negative emotions and experiences because that is what will help us survive," Helfand says. "Unfortunately, in our modern life it hurts our chances to thrive."
How to identify fight, flight, freeze, and fawn
Stress responses are not necessarily harmful, but if they appear more often than not, they can impair your day-to-day.
That's why it's important to understand how to identify these responses. Below, we've outlined each of the four main stress responses and how to tell if they're hindering your quality of life.
1. Fight
The fight response involves aggressively facing the threat. That often includes physically or verbally attacking, Helfand says. People who default to this stress response seek to resolve a threat through conflict.
Examples of a fight response include:
- Physically reacting or fighting
- A clenched jaw or fists
- Yelling, berating, or mocking others
- Slamming doors, destroying property or becoming aggressive
People with a fight response might:
- Ignore others and want the final say
- Have explosive tempers or be easily reactive
- Feel constantly under threat
- Push back on authority
- Feel remorse or shame after outbursts
2. Flight
The flight response involves running away from the threat. People with this pattern protect themselves by escaping or fleeing danger.
Examples of a flight response include the following, Helfand says:
- Literally running away from a threat
- Leaving home after a fight or disagreement
- Ghosting people
- Ending relationships abruptly
- Avoiding commitment, including in relationships
People with a flight response may exhibit these behaviors:
- Trouble being still or having downtime
- Intense focus on work or other achievements
- Micromanaging
- Rushing around
- Being easily distracted
- Experiencing anxiety or panic attacks
3. Freeze
People who freeze are unable to react to and often dissociate from a threat.
"The freeze response is not about movement but rather a kind of pause response," Duckworth says.
In the moment you freeze, you may:
- Be unable to respond.
- Let others yell at you.
- Have a sense of dread
- Hold your breath
- Experience cold, numb, or pale skin
- Have a lowered heart rate
- Feel a sense of stiffness
- Dissociate
People who freeze may experience these behaviors:
- Feeling very calm
- Having the feeling of watching yourself, or being removed from the situation
- Shut down or avoid situations
- Feel that life is pointless
- Have trouble distinguishing reality (what's really happening and what is not)
- Self isolation
- Heavy social media use
- Giving up quickly
People who freeze can sometimes be misdiagnosed with depression.
4. Fawn
People who fawn try to resolve a threat by placating the aggressor or moving closer to the threat.
Fawning "involves a pleasing response to reduce conflict and trauma," Duckworth says. This behavior often shows up in people with complex PTSD (CPTSD), including those who have childhood trauma, he notes.
A fawn response can manifest as:
- People pleasing
- Following others' leads or their decision making
- Being reliant on others
- Being aware of other people's needs, often while ignoring your own
- Being overly polite or agreeable
- Avoiding saying no
- Dissociating
Note: Fawn is the newest stress response, and is less researched than other responses.
What to do if you're stuck in a stress response
If you've survived a trauma or are living with PTSD, then therapy can help, Duckworth says. He recommends trying these therapy options:
- EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization Therapy)
- Exposure therapy
- Neurofeedback
- Internal family systems (IFS) therapy
It's also important to reduce stress and allow yourself opportunities to relax, Helfand says. Mindfulness techniques or grounding techniques, in conjunction with therapy, can help with this.
"Those with trauma have learned that relaxing is equated with vulnerability, so you have to slowly teach your nervous system that it is safe to be relaxed at certain times," he says.
Insider's takeaway
Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn are four ways that people respond to different threats depending on their personality and circumstances. (and past experience)
They evolved to help people deal with threats, like attacking predators. But sometimes people can become stuck in these stress responses, which can lead to self-blame or distrusting others — especially if they have a trauma history.
If you believe you are stuck in a stress response, professional therapy can help you calm and rewire your nervous system so it's not constantly in a state of stress. A mental health professional can help you cope with daily stressors through a healthy, compassionate approach.