4 reasons why you shouldn't put your kid on a diet, according to experts

• Diets can keep kids from getting key nutrients, harm self-esteem, and lead to disordered eating.
• Dietitians and eating disorder specialists suggest introducing healthy habits at home instead.

As a parent, you might naturally worry about all aspects of your child's health. And, since society tends to link thinness to good health, you may find yourself concerned if your child has recently gained some weight.

Maybe you've also considered putting your child on a diet to help manage their weight — but experts generally say this isn't a good idea.

In fact, focusing only on your child's weight and neglecting other aspects of health — like sleep, stress management, and social connections — can actually do more harm than good, according to Dr. Alexis Conason, a clinical psychologist and certified eating disorder specialist.

What's more, diets can harm your child's physical growth and mental health and set them up for a lifetime of disordered eating, Conason says.

Here are four reasons why you shouldn't put your kid on a diet and more effective strategies for lifelong health and weight management, according to experts.

1. Diets can fuel disordered eating behaviors

According to Conason, restricting calories teaches kids to go against the natural rhythms of their body's hunger and fullness cues.

"As a psychologist working with people struggling with eating issues in adulthood, I can tell you, this carries forward for decades and decades of people's lives," Conason says.

Case in point: Dieting to pursue thinness is one of the main risk factors for the development of eating disorders and disordered eating.

Medical term: Disordered eating refers to a range of behaviors that are similar to signs of an eating disorder. In some cases, these behaviors may intensify to a point where they do meet the criteria for an eating disorder diagnosis.

Disordered eating habits may include:

• A preoccupation with food that negatively affects your quality of life
• Constant weight fluctuations
• Feelings of guilt and shame around food and eating

Between 20% and 25% of people who develop disordered eating behaviors as a result of dieting eventually develop an eating disorder, according to the National Eating Disorders Association.

Diets can be particularly damaging to kids just beginning to develop their relationships with food, says Ragen Chastain, a medical researcher and author of the newsletter Weight and Healthcare.

As a matter of fact, one study examining the effects of healthy weight initiatives for school-age kids found programs that promote "healthy eating" in schools may prompt disordered eating in some children.

It's important to note this was a small case study including only four kids, so more research is needed on this topic. Still, these programs may create new concerns around food in children who never worried about their weight before, Chastain says.

2. Dieting can harm a child's growth and development

Childhood is a time of major growth, and kids need energy — which they get from food — to fuel their development.

Specific calorie needs for kids vary based on their age, activity level, height, and weight, says Krystyn Parks, a pediatric dietitian and owner of Feeding Made Easy.

The 2020-2025 Dietary Guidelines set this range of daily calories for kids:

Some kids may fall outside these recommendations and need to eat more, Parks says, especially those who are very active. Parks suggests allowing kids to follow their own hunger and satiety cues instead of aiming for a particular calorie range.

"Kids kind of naturally know what they need, especially before adults start to interfere. Their bodies know how many nutrients and how much energy they need to get through the day," Conason says.

Severely restricting a child's calorie intake may eventually lead to malnourishment, which can cause:

• Stunted growth
• Vitamin and nutritional deficiencies, which can contribute to sleep issues, fatigue, and behavioral problems
• Delayed puberty
• Bone loss and osteoporosis

3. Restrictive diets can damage mental health and body image

Focusing on your kid's weight and restricting what they eat may lead to internalized weight stigma and feelings of shame, according to Jaclyn Powell, a registered dietitian, certified eating disorder specialist, and owner of Jaclyn Powell Nutrition.

"When all of their worth becomes tied up in how they look or a number on a scale, suddenly who they are as a person, as your child, is not enough. Unfortunately, this often spirals into anxiety, depression, and isolation," Powell says.

In one study examining thinness ideals among German adolescents, both teen girls and boys underestimated the average body size of women and showed a preference for a thin-female ideal.

The girls in the study with this bias were also more likely to report harmful dieting behaviors and feelings of stress and anxiety associated with eating and weight.

4. Diets don't work

Beyond the damaging effects they can have on mental health and physical growth, restrictive diets simply don't make good long-term strategies for managing weight, according to Marci Evans, a certified eating disorder registered dietitian and owner of Marci RD Nutrition.

In fact, about 80% to 95% of all dieters who lose weight initially will eventually gain the weight back.

Diets don't work for most people because the behaviors required to create weight loss are typically unsustainable, Evans says. For instance, diets deprive you of calories — and your body responds by increasing your appetite and slowing your metabolism.

Additionally, an older 10-year longitudinal study examining dieting and changes in body mass index (BMI) among teens found that dieting and other behaviors used to lose weight won't necessarily lead to weight loss.

The girls in the study who dieted, skipped meals, or used weight loss pills had a greater increase in BMI by the end of the study than those who did not.

What to do instead

If you're concerned about your child's weight or health and want to encourage healthy habits at home, there are several steps you can take that don't involve a focus on weight loss.

1. Pay attention to how you talk about yourself

The way you talk about your own body can have a huge influence on how your child feels about theirs, Evans says.

In other words, it's best to avoid saying things like:

"I look fat in this."

"I need to lose weight."

Instead show your child how to love themselves in their own body by saying things like:

• "I love that my arms are strong enough to hold you."
• "I'm grateful my legs can carry me on long walks."

2. Have fun with movement

To incorporate more movement into your life, it can help to find physical activities you and your child enjoy and do them together. This can be as simple as having family dance parties in the living room or going on family bike rides around the neighborhood.

Most importantly, show your child with your own words and actions how to approach exercise as an enjoyable way to take care of your body, gain strength and feel good — not as a dreaded chore that you only do to lose weight.

For example, you could say:

• "I like to ride my bike because it helps my legs feel strong enough to chase you when we play tag."
• "I like to do yoga because it helps me feel happy and less stressed when I'm done."

3. Share family meals together

Sitting down to eat together is a great way to connect with your kids and encourage positive eating habits, Evans says.

It can also help to offer a variety of foods at meal times and talk with your kids about all the ways food can nourish their bodies. For instance, you might say things like:

• "This chicken has protein that makes our muscles strong."
• "This pasta has carbohydrates, and those give us energy to play outside together."

4. Get your child involved in the kitchen

You can also get your kids excited about trying new foods by letting them help meal plan, shop for groceries, and prepare food, Parks says.

Kids can help measure out ingredients or chop vegetables, for starters. But you can also teach them how to build a balanced plate by explaining the components of a well-rounded meal and giving them choices for fulfilling each of these nutritional needs.

For instance:

• Protein: Examples include eggs, lean meats, soy, and dairy products.
• Carbohydrates: Examples include whole wheat bread and pasta.
• Fiber: Examples include beans and lentils.
• Fruits and vegetables: Examples include broccoli, apples, and berries.

When to work with a professional

Navigating concerns about weight and healthy eating habits can feel overwhelming for parents, and there's no harm in reaching out for help, Powell says.

If you'd like some extra support, Evans recommends searching for weight-inclusive providers or eating disorder specialists — even if you don't think your child has an eating disorder.

"Eating disorder specialists tend to have greater skill at fostering positive behaviors while reducing the risks associated with weight-focused interventions," Evans says.

There also may be situations where changes in your kid's weight can require medical attention, Powell says.

It's a good idea to talk to a pediatrician if your child:

• Has experienced a drastic weight change, either up or down
• Has made a large divergence from their growth curve
• Shows signs of an eating disorder, like rigid rules around food or weighing themselves frequently

A pediatrician can evaluate these concerns and determine if your child has an underlying medical condition that can affect their weight and may require treatment, like hypothyroidism.

Insider's takeaway

If you have concerns about your child's weight, it's best to seek the help of a registered dietitian instead of restricting their calorie intake.

Since restrictive diets can harm your child's physical growth and mental health, experts generally recommend focusing on developing healthy habits as a family and modeling the importance of exercise and balanced meals.

Keep in mind, too, that living in a bigger body doesn't necessarily mean someone is unhealthy, Chastain says. Additionally, lifestyle changes like getting adequate sleep, finding tools to manage stress, increasing physical activity, and eating nourishing foods may ultimately mean more for your child's health than the number on the scale.

There are people of all sizes at every point along the health spectrum, and what matters more for a child's health in the long term is creating a nurturing environment filled with unconditional love and acceptance, Evans says.