I'm a 25-year-old newlywed and share my bank account with my husband - here's why
- A shared bank account can be the right choice for many married couples.
- 68% of Americans feel awkward talking about money, but being open about money can be beneficial in a relationship.
- Financial transparency may help avoid future conflicts about debt and savings with your spouse.
- Sharing a bank account helps some couples establish more trust in a relationship.
I hate talking about money.
I cringe when my colleagues bring up student debt or what they pay in rent, but the one place I was determined to be open and honest about my finances was in my marriage.
Like many millennials, I have student loan debt, but my husband does not. He loves to save, while I'm more of a spender. Addressing these issues before we said "I do" allowed us to enter into our union worry-free.
Here's why we took the plunge to pool our money:
1. Going into my marriage, I wanted there to be total transparency
I don't believe that sharing a bank account is the key to a happy marriage or that it will prevent my husband and I from arguing about money. What it has done, however, is help us to identify what kind of home and lifestyle we can afford.
By being practical about what we can afford as a couple and our goals for the future, I hope to avoid as much future conflict as possible. And so far, it's working!
2. Yours and mine isn't helpful for us
It's great to maintain autonomy in your marriage, but it can be downright detrimental when you take that approach to your income. The lower earning spouse may start to feel inferior, or the higher earning spouse may feel like they have more power or say in the spending.
By sharing our savings, we eliminate that power struggle. My husband usually earns more money than me. Still, there have been times when my freelance work has been really fruitful, and I'll out earn him. But to be completely honest, neither one of us thinks much about it because it all ends up in the same place. The money is ours and we both really look at it that way.
3. We totally trust each other
Some married couples argue that separate bank accounts prevent one spouse from running off with all of the couple's shared money. I don't understand that rationalization, however, because my husband and I find that sharing our money enhances our mutual trust.
I know he's not going to blow all of our money on something frivolous and dumb. He respects me and the hard work I've done to earn that money - and he thinks the same of me in return.
4. We can still do things separately
Just because you share a savings account doesn't mean you can't have financial independence elsewhere. We each have at least one credit card that the other is not a certified user on.
Some things I use my personal card to buy are my husband's birthday gifts or little surprises. That way he won't see the transaction before he's actually been given the gift.
5. It helps us save for goals
As a married couple, we have a lot of the same financial goals - buying furniture for our new house, booking our flights for two upcoming weddings, and planning our next vacation. Instead of taking a piecemeal approach to these costs, we tackle them head on together.
It simplifies our lives and makes us feel like a team when we accomplish our goals.