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I played KFC's bizarre Colonel Sanders dating game so you don't have to

Kevin Webb   

I played KFC's bizarre Colonel Sanders dating game so you don't have to
Retail3 min read

KFC Dating Sim

Two weeks ago KFC stunned video game fans by announcing a brand new game starring the company's mascot, Colonel Sanders. Things got even weirder when the game was revealed to be a dating simulator with Colonel Sanders as the prized companion.

I'm still shocked to confirm to you that "I Love You Colonel Sanders: A Finger Licking Good Dating Simulator" is a real video game, and you can now play it for free on your PC or Mac.

In "I Love You Colonel Sanders," players enroll in a cooking class alongside Colonel Sanders and try to win his heart with cooking expertise and clever conversation. KFC's game is a parody of traditional dating sim games - these text-based adventures are popular in Japan and usually let the player pursue a partner from a collection of males or females. Players are faced with a series of conversation choices as they try to romance the character of their choosing.

I Love You Colonel Sanders Pot Pie Power Pinch

Unsurprisingly, all of your attention in KFC's game is dedicated to the Colonel, but the formula remains the same. You'll have to talk your way through three days at the cooking school with the Colonel and a colorful cast of characters, and at the end you'll find out if you managed to win the Colonel's love. The game takes about an hour to complete, but you can replay it to see new endings and slightly different story routes.

Read more: KFC is serving fried chicken sandwiched between 2 glazed doughnuts at dozens of locations, and people are freaking out

"I Love You Colonel Sanders" is ripe with anime clichés and character tropes poking fun at Japan's popular dating simulators, so you might miss out on some of the jokes if you're not familiar with the genre. Frankly, the game's constant use of anime stereotypes will probably be annoying to fans of regular dating sims, and reinforces stereotypes about Japan and anime culture that were probably best left in the 90s.

In recent years the dating sim genre has become more popular in the queer community for allowing players to experience complex narratives involving gay, bisexual, and polyamorous relationships. "I Love You Colonel Sanders" draws from the worst parts of the genre for comedic effect.

I Love You Colonel Sanders

While the free game is an obvious marketing stunt for KFC, "I Love You Colonel Sanders" is a complete game and clearly took some hard work to produce. Producing a detailed text-based adventure like this still requires original art, character designs, and decent writing to keep the conversations flowing. Psyop, the studio that produced the game, released another text adventure called "Camp W" last year, so they had a bit of prior experience in the genre.

I can't recommend that anyone else play KFC's dating sim, but it certainly can't be worse for you than KFC's new fried chicken & doughnut sandwich.

Here's a closer look at what it's like to play "I Love You Colonel Sanders: A Finger Licking Good Dating Simulator:"

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