Here's when I'm ok with using my hard-earned points and miles on friends and family - and when I'm not

Holly JohnsonMar 16, 2019, 00:19 IST

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Travel-rewards credit cards like the Platinum Card® from American Express, Chase Sapphire Reserve, and Chase Sapphire Preferred Card make it easy to earn points and miles you can use to see the world.
You can share your points and miles with friends and family, but you aren't required to by any means.
Remember that some people cannot earn their own credit cards rewards for various reasons, including less than stellar credit.

When you pursue points and miles like it's your part-time job, it's easy for the people in your life to become confused. People close to you may wonder how you afford to travel so often, and so far from home. If you're earning enough points and miles to fly business or first class or stay in five-star resorts, then your loved ones might even be flabbergasted about your lifestyle and your finances.

But, those of us who earn a lot of points know a secret that most people can't comprehend.

With the right combination of travel-rewards credit cards and some creative spending, you can travel the world for a lot less than people think. Even though most people associate credit cards with debt, there are plenty of us who maximize rewards without paying a cent in credit card interest.

Read more: 9 lucrative credit card deals new cardholders can get this month - including up to 75,000 Delta SkyMiles

Should you share your points and miles with friends? Here are a few reasons to consider it

Should you be willing to share the points and miles you work so hard to accrue? This question tends to be controversial among points-and-miles enthusiasts, mostly because there are incredibly strong feelings on both sides.

There are two main schools of thought, the first being that they're your points and miles to spend how you want. If you want to share them to help friends and family see the world, then why shouldn't you?

On the flip side, many people wonder why your family and friends can't earn their own rewards. What's stopping them from researching travel-rewards credit cards and figuring out which credit card rewards programs are best for their needs? It seems like every rewards enthusiast I know has at least one family member or friend who expects their travel to be paid for without any effort on their part, and that's not right.

While both arguments make sense, I am mostly okay with sharing points and miles provided I do so on my own terms.

Here's why:

Not everyone can earn points and miles - at least right now

Earlier this year, my husband and I started planning a trip to Italy with a few friends. We figured we would pay for our flights with airline miles and our friends could earn their own miles or pay for the flights with cash.

After we talked over our travel budgets, however, we determined that they would need to find absurdly cheap flights to make it work - or they would need to pick up an airline credit card or two to earn enough miles to cover round-trip airfare. Unfortunately, they had just started the process of trying to refinance their home. To avoid any problems with their refinance, they needed to hold off on applying for a new credit cards for a while.

Considering the circumstances (and our huge stash of points), my husband and I decided to pay for all our flights with rewards. Ultimately, that meant spending 120,000 American miles for four one-way flights to Italy and 100,000 Air France/Flying Blue miles for our flights home. We only asked that our friends pay us for their share of airline taxes and fees, which worked out to around $300.

The reality is, some people don't have the ability to earn points at the drop of a hat. They might have financial circumstances that make applying for new credit a bad idea, such as the purchase or a new home. Since the top travel credit cards, like the AmEx Platinum, Chase Sapphire Reserve, and Chase Sapphire Preferred Card, are usually only available for people with very good credit, it's also possible that their credit score could preclude them from qualifying even if they wanted to.

For other people, minimum spending requirements pose a huge problem. Since most travel-rewards credit cards require you to spend $3,000 to $5,000 within a few months to earn a big sign-up bonus, people who don't have many regular expenses may not be able to take advantage without putting their finances at risk.

Travel is more rewarding when you can share it with people you love

I frequently use points and miles for my parents to travel with my family, mostly because I like it when they come along. They gave up a lot when they were raising my siblings and I during the '80s and '90s, and I enjoy taking them places and helping them enjoy life in retirement. I shared some of my points to take them on spring break in Jamaica last year and watching them enjoy the sand and surf with their grandkids was totally worth it. Next year we're all going to Italy together and I paid for all our flights with airline miles. I have zero regrets since paying cash for six flights would have been an enormous burden!

Maybe you have someone in your life who you love to spend time with, or perhaps you want to see your favorite destinations through the eyes of someone you love - someone who has never been there. Either way, sharing your miles can help. If shared experiences are the bedrock of friendship, then traveling with others could even strengthen your ties to the people you value most.

Give generously without spending money

If you're tight on cash but wish you could be more generous, credit card rewards offer an easy way to give without putting yourself out.

You can pursue cash back to spend on gifts or gift cards for people you care about, and many rewards programs even let you use your points to shop for merchandise through Amazon or their own portals.

Some rewards cards like the Discover it® Miles even let you give your rewards to a charity of your choice. This card's charitable program, called Discover Giving, lets you donate points accrued on your card to 1.5 million charities worldwide.

If you want to give someone you love the gift of travel for their birthday or a holiday, also remember that you can use most types of points and miles to book travel for other people. You can redeem most airline miles for flights in another person's name, for example, and you can use flexible travel points to book travel for anyone you want. Hotel points can be trickier, but it is possible to book a room with points and add another person's name to your reservation with some programs.

The bottom line

Spending points and miles on others is one way to be generous without spending real money. And, if you have some extra points and miles to burn, why not share?

Whether to share your points and miles is a decision only you can make, but you should never be forced into it. If someone in your life is constantly asking you to pay for their travel because they don't want to put in the effort, then it's time to cut them off.

On the other hand, there's nothing wrong with sharing if you have the option and feel like being generous.

Approach situation on a case-by-case basis and do what feels right and you'll never have any regrets.

A few great travel-rewards credit cards we recommend

You can learn more about, and sign up for, all of the following cards through our partner, The Points Guy.

Chase Sapphire Preferred - $95 annual fee, waived the first year;
Chase Sapphire Reserve - $450 annual fee
AmEx Platinum - $550 annual fee

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