Here Are Some Of Amazon's Funniest Product Reviews Of All Time

Amazon's customer reviews are tremendously helpful. And when they're not helpful, they're pretty hilarious.

The e-commerce behemoth put out this collection of its funniest customer reviews. Here are our favorites.

The Hutzler 571 Banana Slicer: "Gone are the days of biting off slice-sized chunks of banana and spitting them onto a serving tray…. Next on my wish list: a kitchen tool for dividing frozen water into cube-sized chunks."

Three Wolf Moon T-Shirt: "I believe that wearing this t-shirt has made me a better man, which is remarkable because, well....I'm a chick."

Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon: "Do you have any idea where this stuff comes from? It's excreted by squeezing the wobbly thingie on the UNDERSIDE OF A COW! That's hardly made clear anywhere on the label."

Uranium Ore: "I purchased this product 4.47 Billion Years ago and when I opened it today, it was half empty."

Accoutrements Horse Head Mask: "It is day 87 and the horses have accepted me as one of their own. I have grown to understand and respect their gentle ways."

Disclosure: Jeff Bezos is an investor in Business Insider through his personal investment company Bezos Expeditions.