Former Hotel Maid Dishes On The Grossest Things She Saw At Work

It's one of those subjects we just can't seem to get enough of—hotel housekeeping. We love to hear stories about your experiences with the staff, good or bad.

But even better, we adore it when the maids themselves dish the literal dirt on what they've seen with their own eyes.

We happened to check out this story called "Sh*t the Hotel Maid Says" and we thought it was high time we interviewed someone in the industry, because the stories we read were hilarious (a spider monkey hiding in the vent??).

A pal of ours (we'll call her "Maid Marian") did a housekeeper stint at a boutique hotel that happens to be on the PGA Tour circuit. It's not a big chain, so she requested anonymity.

Here's her lowdown on the best and worst things she saw, and tips on how to be a great guest.

HotelChatter: Worst guest pet peeve?

Maid Marian: No tipping. Or tipping literal pocket change. Or leaving stuff all over so we can't clean because we cannot touch guests' belongings.

HC: Who are the best guests?

MM: The ones who know how housekeeping works. Items are put in one spot for easier cleaning. Those who have friendly faces instead of disdain for "the help".

HC: What's the nastiest thing you've seen in a hotel room?

MM:The guest who apparently hadn't flushed the toilet in days.

HC: How much is a good tip and where's the best place to leave it?

MM: I had a lady who lived in the hotel who gave me $8 a day! But that's unusual. $2-3 is good. Best place to leave it is on the tray with cups/ice bucket. It's pretty obvious that way. We can't assume money left in random places is for us. In the bathroom underneath the waterglass is good, too. It's like a restaurant--you leave it where it's obviously for the recipient--like a $20 on the nightstand for a hooker!

HC: How much time are you given to clean a room?

MM: We had 14 minutes. Bathroom, wash cups, coffee pot, change sheets and towels, comforter only once a week unless it's got spills on it. Dust and vacuum.

HC: OMG. Was that enough time with your more..slovenly guests?

MM: Not enough time. At all. That was for singles, doubles, and suites!

HC: How has your experience affected your own hotel stays?

MM:I am super neat as I have more sympathy for the housekeeping staff. But, I will no longer sit in a hotel bathtub. When we cleaned the bathrooms, we sprayed everything down with cleaner, started filling the tub with hot water, wiped down sink and counter, took the toilet brush to the toilet, then used the toilet brush to clean the tub.

HC: You may have just traumatized a lot of people with that one.

MM: Yeah, lol.