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I inherited $250,000 from my grandmother and regret how I spent it. I wish I had overcome my fears around money sooner.

Aug 22, 2024, 16:51 IST
Business Insider
Sara Faith Jacobsen.Courtesy of Sara Faith Jacobsen
  • Sara Faith Jacobsen inherited $250,000 in January 2021 but didn't have a plan for the money.
  • After spending most of her inheritance, she sought help from a financial advisor to rebuild.
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This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Sara Faith Jacobsen, a 40-year-old corporate consultant in Texas. The following has been edited for length and clarity.

Growing up, I knew very little about money. In the 5th grade, I learned how to balance a checkbook — that was about all of my financial literacy.

I went to college and graduated with a bachelor's degree in women's studies in 2007. My family paid for college, so I graduated debt-free.

When I came into a large sum of money in 2021, I wasn't sure what to do with it, and I regret how I spent it.

I worked as a birth doula and did prenatal and postpartum massage

I became a lactation educator and then a lactation consultant, so I was in the mother-baby realm for most of my professional life in Colorado. The pay was not great, but my family helped me financially by paying my rent.

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During this time, my father told me I was in my grandmother's will and I would receive an inheritance. She died in November 2020.

When I inherited $250,000 in January 2021, I quickly realized that I didn't have a plan for the money

My grandparents were successful real estate investors in the San Francisco Bay Area in the 1970s. I inherited $75,000 from my grandma's will and $175,000 from her life insurance policy. My sister and my two cousins all received the same amount of money.

I received the $175,000 as a lump sum and the $75,000 in multiple payments over the following months.

When a trustee for my grandmother's accounts transferred the $175,000 into my bank account, I realized I had a lot of fear around money.

Seeing it was relieving, as I didn't have much money then, but it quickly turned into feelings about not being good enough or worthy and deserving of having money.

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I hired a financial advisor, and then I ghosted her

I hired a financial advisor who offered a yearlong program in which we would meet twice a month to develop a plan for the money I received. We would also talk about changing my career and creating career goals.

Even though I paid her $5,000 fully in advance, I ghosted her because of my limiting beliefs about money and spent my inheritance pretty quickly. I wasn't ready to deal with my emotional issues around money.

I decided I wanted to leave Colorado because I was done with the snow. I put some of my stuff in storage, loaded up my Subaru Crosstrek with six months' worth of stuff, and took off.

I blew through the money living life

I'm a champagne-taste-on-beer-budget kind of girl. I took a road trip to places I wanted to move to and spent most of my inheritance on that trip.

I had left my job and didn't have an income source — I lived off the inheritance money. I went to the Denver area for two weeks, then to Colorado Springs for three weeks, and then to Santa Fe, New Mexico, for about three weeks before landing in Austin.

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I spent a good portion of my inheritance on Airbnbs, hotels, gas, and food. Some other items I purchased with my money were expensive health equipment for $5,000, a $2,000 silver diamond ring that I still own, and two fancy dinners in Santa Fe.

After this trip, I was ready to confront my feelings about money, so I contacted the same financial advisor

Looking back, I struggled because I never received a financial education. Money was not tight for my family, and I never had to pay for anything as a child.

I think having a plan for the money would have been important — that's what I did wrong. I also wish I had been willing to confront some of my complicated feelings about money — shame, and judgment of myself.

Even though I ghosted her, I went back to the financial advisor about a year later. I had spent most of my money by then, but we met, and she was understanding and compassionate. She agreed to work together since I had already paid the $5,000 upfront.

She helped me get back on my feet when I was in a dire situation. We examined my financial situation practically, and she gave me steps I could take to overcome it. She also helped me brainstorm my career options and set up a plan.

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In January 2022, I had a come-to-Jesus moment — I had to make money. I got a job doing elder care and started working side jobs.

It was a dramatic situation to receive a big chunk of cash and then freak out and not know what to do with it

The financial advisor helped me heal a lot of my money trauma and my money blocks — I've done a lot of healing work. I also have improved my financial literacy.

I rent an apartment in San Antonio, and I'm still building up my salary. I haven't started investing or saving, but when I have the extra money, I want to invest in Real Estate Investment Trusts.

I'm passionate about my leadership work in the corporate world. I'm in a better place, and if I were to receive a large chunk of money again, I would have the capacity to hold it and use it wisely.

Want to share your story? Email Lauryn Haas at lhaas@businessinsider.com.

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