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'I May Destroy You' intimacy coordinator was 'delighted' to finally help depict period sex on screen

Kirstie Renae   

'I May Destroy You' intimacy coordinator was 'delighted' to finally help depict period sex on screen
  • Intimacy coordinator Ita O'Brien told Insider about what it's like working on film and TV sets.
  • She was "delighted" to see realistic period sex depicted on HBO's "I May Destroy You."

Period sex isn't often depicted on screen, but some creators are determined to change that.

Ita O'Brien, the UK's leading intimacy coordinator and founder of Intimacy on Set, spoke with Insider about her work on shows like Hulu's "Normal People," HBO's "I May Destroy You," and Netflix's "Sex Education."

Creating realistic intimate content is one of her favorite parts of the job, and she was quick to praise Michaela Coel, the creator, writer, and star of "I May Destroy You," for her depiction of period sex on screen.

Coel didn't hold back in creating an authentic depiction of period sex, and O'Brien was 'proud and delighted'

On episode three of "I May Destroy You," Arabella (Coel) has sex with Biagio (Marouane Zotti) while she's on her period. Before they begin, they lay out a towel and Biagio pulls out Arabella's tampon and inspects a blood clot.

O'Brien, who was personally thanked by Coel during her acceptance speech at the BAFTA Awards, told Insider this period-sex scene was so important.

"[Coel] was asked, 'Why did you write that?' And said, 'That's a part of it. That happens, so why not write it?'" she said. "And I was so proud and delighted to read her writing."

She continued, "How often is it depicted? Realistically? And I was so delighted that that scene was there. But that's why I want more of it."

O'Brien said she hopes more writers are encouraged and inspired to create authentic sex scenes.

"I want more people out there knowing that they can write more realistic intimate content, both in the emotional journeys of our intimate engagement and physically," she said.

The intimacy coordinator believes that the entertainment industry has a responsibility to portray realistic sex scenes

As an intimacy coordinator, drama teacher, and movement director, O'Brien understands that so many people gain their understanding and knowledge of sex from films and TV.

"That's what I was bowled over about - the real-life impact that doing good work in this way really, really has," she said.

She believes it's the industry's responsibility to portray realistic sex scenes, a task that's made easier and safer with the presence of an intimacy coordinator on set.

O'Brien said it's up to intimacy coordinators to educate themselves on different details about authentic sexual experiences, and then they can bring that research to film and TV writers to collaborate on intimate storylines.

"Then it can be depicted clearly, that's what excites me," she told Insider. "And to keep looking at how we can make groundbreaking intimate content that serves people."

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