It's time to rethink what work-life balance really means

• A work-life balance is a priority for many.
• It's generally thought of as the balance between time at work and personal time.

The pursuit of a work-life balance is at the heart of so many workplace conversations.

It's what many Gen Zers want from their jobs, and what workers cling to as their employers ask them to return to the office.

It has generally become known as the balance between time at work and time off. But we should rethink that, according to some workplace specialists.

People all work differently, and suggesting the best way to achieve equilibrium is to log off at 5 p.m. could be shortsighted and outdated.

"I don't think work-life balance exists," Dilan Gomih, the founder and CEO of the workplace performance and wellness consultancy Dilagence, told Business Insider. "It should be, How do you find time to strategically recharge?"

The work-life unicorn

Jeff Bezos talked about his dislike for the phrase "work-life balance" in 2021, calling it "debilitating" and telling employees that they should think of work and life as a circle. Other CEOs have opinions, too, often favoring a different approach.

In an interview at Vox's Code Conference in 2016, Bezos said: "I find that when I am happy at work, I come home more energized. I'm a better husband, a better dad, and when I'm happy at home, I come in a better boss, a better colleague."

Some might say it's easy for billionaire bosses to say hours don't matter and that it's how energized you feel by work that counts.

However, provided work doesn't overtake all of your personal time, there may be some wisdom in rethinking the definition of work-life balance.

Veronica West, a psychologist with a master's in public health and the founder of My Thriving Mind, told BI that work-life balance is "the elusive unicorn we're all trying to catch."

"It used to mean dividing work time and personal time into neat, equal slices," she said. "But let's be honest, life rarely plays nice like that."

A better way to think of it might be a "work-life rhythm," she said, which is not based on counting hours but a "feeling that both work and life energize rather than drain you."

Logging off at 5 p.m. every day isn't achievable for everyone, so it's beneficial to find a flow where work doesn't exhaust you so that you have time for hobbies, exercise, downtime, socializing, and family time.

"The trick is learning how to balance energy, not just time, so you're surviving and enjoying each part of your day," West said. "Because, honestly, if we're dragging through one area to show up in another, where's the fun in that?"

Finding your 'golden hour'

Gomih said there's a general perception that well-being means disengagement, and this is "a really binary view" that should be reconsidered.

Rather, people should think about when their "golden hour" is, she said, describing it as when "your brain is totally on or when you are doing your most creative thinking."

"My golden hour is probably between 6 a.m. and 9 a.m. I also know somebody's golden hour to be 7 p.m. to midnight," Gomih said.

Women can feel particularly conflicted about balancing their careers and time off, especially when working outside normal hours is met with judgment.

"Senior women leaders who happen to be caregivers of some manner, shape, or form, they have a lot on their plates," added Gomih. For them, working irregular hours may suit them better.

"It's knowing your own settings, when to turn off and when to turn on," Gomih said. "Spending time with my family fills my cup in some way, and being good at my job fills my cup in some way, and these things are very much reinforcing of each other."

Breese Annable, a licensed clinical psychologist and career coach, told BI achieving a balance means aligning your personal life and career with your values and strengths.

"It's not just a split of hours; it's a way of living where all parts of life, including work, mirror who you are and what matters most," she said.

"Of course, this is an ideal — it won't ever be perfect," Annable said. "But it's a consistent vision to guide the decisions you make in both life and work."

West said some days are going to need more work, and others will need more life. The key is to aim for harmony, she said, not perfection