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It's become alarmingly fashionable to compare the Tesla Model 3 with other luxury sedans, especially BMWs.
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The basis for these comparisons is to suggest that Tesla has begun a process of "conquesting" its "competitors'" customers. This provides Tesla's boosters with the math they need to predict Tesla sales increases, which to grow in the US market in particular would need to capture market share from brands such as BMW, Mercedes, Audi, and Lexus.
I don't think that math makes sense. But Tesla recently offered a acceleration upgrade to its long-range, dual-motor Model 3, the second-highest-performing variant of the car. The 0-60mph time has, according to Tesla, dropped to 3.9 seconds from 4.4 seconds. The cost to the owners would be $2,000.
(The Performance trim offers a 0-60 mph time of 3.2 seconds.)
Forgetting for a moment the in-app-purchases aspect of this - Tesla owners might at some level feel like their vehicle is more like a video game than a vehicle - I thought that it would be reasonable to run a straight-up comparo of the long-range Model 3 and a similarly quick bimmer, the M3.
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We're currently between M3 editions; the outgoing car was retired in 2018, but the new 3-Series has launched, and we should see a successor M3 next year.
Here's how the upgraded Model 3 long-range and the M3 stack up:
Styling-wise, the Model 3 is a sharp set of wheels. But the higher-performance versions don't look much different than the more modest trims.
The Model 3 is a fastback design, but minus a hatchback.
The top-spec Model 3 can hit 60 mph in 3.2 seconds. That's faster than the M3, and the Tesla costs less — roughly $10,000 less. Sooo, with the upgraded long-range Model 3 matching the M3's 0-60, yet priced at just about $50,000, are we dealing with a massive bargain here?
Indeed we are! But this is blessing and a curse for Tesla.
The company has essentially one platform in the Model 3, and it has to use it to attack numerous market segments.
So while the faster long-range Model 3 looks good on paper, Tesla is effectively being forced to make the argument it always does to performance-seeking consumers: You won't believe how fast this thing is! Because just looking at it, OF COURSE you wouldn't think that.
This argument is attractive for customers who wouldn't have given much thought to a high-performance car in the first place. They might have been BMW 3-Series buyers, so Tesla makes inroads there. But as usual, Tesla has to use the software case to get the proper Ultimate Driving Machine buyers to look twice, and they're going to be considerably more skeptical.
That said, you have to credit Tesla with offering some impressive speed at a substantial discount to the gas-powered competition.
The Model 3's interior is radically minimal and unlike any other performance car. In fact, to my eye, it isn't a performance-type interior at all.
The M3 has a trunk, but up front is an engine bay. No such thing on the Model 3, which can provide crossover-like utility with its front "trunk" or "frunk."
The biggest difference between the two vehicles could be one of lifestyle. The Model 3 requires recharging, and even with Tesla fast-charging network, a full "refill" consumes an hour and gets you 322 miles of range. But, no tailpipe emissions, and long-term, electricity is cheaper than petrol.
On to the mighty BMW M3!
It's been a few years since I tested the M3, but with a new 3-Series in the market, it's just a matter of time before I refresh my impressions.
To be honest, the most stunning flavor of this genre for BMW is the M4, which sent me a-staggerin' when I drove the drop-top version.
The M division has been part of Bayerische Motoren Werke AG since the early 1970s. These days, BMW M-ifies pretty much every vehicle in its lineup. But the M3 holds a special place in enthusiast's hearts.
The M3 dates the 1980s and has been offered ever since.
The platform has distinguished itself in motorsports. This used to be an important sales tool, but Tesla has learned that it doesn't need to put its cars on the track. BMW, however, continues to be a big factor in racing.
Here's the new 3-Series.
And here's the fifth-generation M3. The lines and scale are usually about the same, but the M3 usually earns a more aggressive appearance and is crammed with performance modifications.
Not a Tesla interior. The M3's cockpit is entirely organized around the driver.
The twin-turbo six-banger under the hood makes 425 horsepower with 406 pound-feet of torque. Transmissions? A 6-speed stick (Yum!) and a 7-speed dual-clutch auto.
If I'm in the market for a driver's car, I'm still buying the M3.
I've always enjoyed Teslas for their straight-line speed, but I'm not unusual in that respect.
Unfortunately, while the handling in Teslas is better than what I've expected going into road tests, the last Tesla that truly thrilled me in this respect was the original Roadster — but that car was based on a Lotus chassis, well known for its cornering capabilities.
The whole fetishization of o-60 times in the car business is something that's been rightly ridiculed by critics who actually drive a lot of high-performance cars. Most drivers can't manage the power that delivers the drag-strip velocity, nor do they have the opportunity to, outside of the occasional unimpeded freeway merge.
One of the best-driving cars money can buy, the Mazda MX-5 Miata, gets from 0-60 mph two whole seconds slower then highest-spec Model 3, but it delivers the sort of all-around thrills that remind you of why the most enthralling experiences behind the wheel are more about bonding with the car that being pressed back in your seat.
The BMW M3 is obviously a lot more car than the Miata, and it offers something quite different in the all-around category. The M3 is wild. It's a living, breathing merchant of menace. Develop some control over that — learn the M3's moods — and you can have fun beyond your mundane imaginings.
BUT you need to commit to the learning. The M3 isn't an especially forgiving car. But it rewards edification.
For the most part, Tesla hasn't yet seduced the enthusiast driver, although the company's cars have earned a lot of credibility with the enthusiast-oriented motoring press. This is why Tesla keeps pushing straight-line speed; it's similar to what Detroit did for decades with its muscle cars, when everybody who knew anything about driving favored the European models.
It's jarring that Tesla, the high-tech Silicon Valley hero, is relying on the most backwoods of performance metrics, but there you have it. This is an American car company after all.
Having driven several Model 3s, including the enthusiast spec, I can say that there probably isn't that much practical difference between the $2,000-extra, somewhat faster dual-motor car and the single-motor options. The 0-60-in-3.9 could serve up a more compelling WOOSH! when you step on it. A neat trick, but once it's over, it's over, and EV off-the-line acceleration is so snappy that it can actually be challenging to deal with on a daily basis, particularly in a four-door that's likely to have a fair amount of stuff scattered around the cabin (Batten down that latte before you punch it!).
The last time I tested a Model 3, I put the acceleration option in Chill mode because I just wasn't finding that many opportunities to blast the thing up to the legal speed limit.
Now, you might reasonably argue that I'd implicitly be doing the same thing with the M3. And you'd be right. The M3 has a bunch of performance drive modes, and I typically avoid the most bonkers of these. But the M3 is simply more visceral at lower speeds, while the Model 3, to its detriment, is kind of unengaging, physically, when it isn't accelerating.
I hate to posit a hoary mind-body duality here, but the M3 has been designed to grab you in the guts while the Model 3 goes for the cerebrum. I don't personally think much when I'm driving an M3. But I'm thinking all the time in a Model 3. The latter is a car of ideas, while the former is telling one story: Grrrr!!!
Here's the thing, however: Tesla is getting into the habit of delivering internal-combustion-besting performance with its more mid-range cars, and as far as this comparison with the M3 goes, the value-proposition is hard to undermine. The M3 is gonna cost you more to buy and more to operate.
Ah, but you see what's happening here? THINKING! For all the convincing that Tesla does, it demands that buyers be rational actors. But performance cars are irrational. If you're shopping for an M3, you've already sort of lost your mind. You don't care if you're going to be shelling out more dollars to put premium fuel in the tank, or that you're looking at keeping expensive performance rubber on the wheels.
A while back, Tesla developed an option called "Insane Mode," to serve up quick acceleration. It was soon supplanted by "Ludicrous Mode." Those are cool names, but Teslas are anything but insane. That sobriquet belongs still, and rightly, to the legacy driver's cars. Among which the M3 — for now — remains a standout.