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- I wish there had been a requirement before pregnancy to shadow a parent for a week. I would have learned a lot.
- Anxiety is the enemy of instinct. I should have let my instinct kick in, rather than worrying about every little thing.
- Dropping out of the workforce left me with regrets - I think I would have been a better mom had I been doing something productive in the world too.
I was never a "kid" person. I didn't babysit much as a teen, and before I had kids, I barely knew anyone with kids. I had no idea how to talk to a kid. But I knew I wanted one - the urge hit me at 30, and even with no partner in sight, nesting with a little one was what I craved.
So when I finally got married, pretty late in my 30s, and we finally got pregnant with the aid of IVF, I thought having a baby seemed like an OK idea. The IVF folks called this a "miracle" embryo for having implanted on my first IVF try, and it seemed like I was blessed. All would be well.
Then, we moved back to the east coast, and suddenly, my OB/gyn was administering tons of tests and frightening me with the possibility of problems. After all, I was labeled AMA, for "advanced maternal age." They considered me a high-risk pregnancy. I had never been high-risk anything. I started to get nervous. I read up, obsessed, and worried.
Here's what I would do differently, if I had it to do all over again: